Out of Breath Records Posted April 29, 2014 Share Posted April 29, 2014 So let's hear some crazy/weird/funny co-ed stories. I'll start. I was 16 and I randomly added a girl on my best friend(girl)'s Facebook list because I thought she was cute. We start talking and she was really quirky, but nothing crazy, just had a different take on stuff, and was generally just all over the place. She was very musically talented and had a beautiful voice (she would show me videos, haven't met her in person yet). I was digging her so I asked if she wanted to hang out with me and best friend and go to a movie. She was down. Best friend tells me she's really weird, and I figured how weird could someone possibly be, she seems normal enough, so whatever. So I pick her up, and she opens the car door (I wasn't paying attention so didn't see her walk up) and damn, she really is cute, like a total 9/10. Everyone said hi and we were off to go see a movie. Then she started being weird. She had this weird linguistic problem where this white girl who lives in Orange County was talking like she was a chola straight out of East LA. She kept rolling my windows up and down for no reason. Then she brought out a pair of scissors from her pocket and started cutting her hair in my car, super weird, but whatever maybe we'll just hook up or something, she's still hot. So we get to the parking structure and everyone gets out and then I see that she's literally 5 feet tall. Some legal midget shit. I'm kind of taken aback because I'm not a tall dude and he goes up to about my chest. She's 16 or 17 and is the height of a 5th grader, which kind of weird me out because of her childish personality. So we try and sneak into the movie theater cuz no one has money. We were gonna give up, and my date had wandered off, we were about to go in because a door opened up and she said she was gonna go home because her friend was gonna pick her up. I had completely given up at this point so I was like whatever nbd. Later that night she texts me that she regrets not fucking my brains out in the elevator. She sent me some weirdly angled nudes of her spread butt cheeks (10/10 nice butt) and then I just stopped talking to her. Now every so often she'll delete me on Facebook and readd me a months later. This doesn't have to be about ex's specifically, not sure what to call it though. turbobrando, cemeterytapes, seamoney and 3 others 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Satan Posted April 29, 2014 Share Posted April 29, 2014 I can see people having meltdowns in this thread thinking about an ex. ...or it's just gonna be full of nudes. andy. and SpazzyMcGee 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StrangeTerrain Posted April 29, 2014 Share Posted April 29, 2014 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bladewillisisdead Posted April 29, 2014 Share Posted April 29, 2014 I have a bunch of crazy stories about the girl I dated from 17-20. Instead I'll just sum it up: It was awful, I was miserable, and it was all my fault for not ending the relationship after a couple weeks. Or at any other point. I had a lot of really good opportunities too. Like that time she pulled a knife on me for wearing a shirt she didn't like. seamoney 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Out of Breath Records Posted April 29, 2014 Author Share Posted April 29, 2014 I have a bunch of crazy stories about the girl I dated from 17-20. Instead I'll just sum it up: It was awful, I was miserable, and it was all my fault for not ending the relationship after a couple weeks. Or at any other point. I had a lot of really good opportunities too. Like that time she pulled a knife on me for wearing a shirt she didn't like. Details, friend. Details. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kamalatapes Posted April 29, 2014 Share Posted April 29, 2014 One time I dated this one girl in the 8th grade, then in 11th grade I dated her cousin (my ex and I remained friends by now she was full blown lesbian) Yep that's my story hot Asian women, cousins, swoooon <3 Of course nothing can compare to my wife who I'm happily married in love with Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Out of Breath Records Posted April 29, 2014 Author Share Posted April 29, 2014 One time I dated this one girl in the 8th grade, then in 11th grade I dated her cousin (my ex and I remained friends by now she was full blown lesbian) Yep that's my story hot Asian women, cousins, swoooon <3 Of course nothing can compare to my wife who I'm happily married in love with 3 some. Wincest Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
castaway Posted April 29, 2014 Share Posted April 29, 2014 In the 6th grade I attended dance camp (pause for lulz) and this girl I barely knew cut herself and wrote my name on her arm with the blood. We didn't end up dating Hungrydinoz, chamb117, superpeephole and 4 others 7 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bladew1ll1s1sdead Posted April 29, 2014 Share Posted April 29, 2014 An ex stabbed me in the arm with a 2 inch pocket knife when I was 14 so there's that. AlexMBentley, superpeephole, chamb117 and 1 other 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bladewillisisdead Posted April 29, 2014 Share Posted April 29, 2014 Details, friend. Details. Really the best part is being able to say "She pulled a knife on me because she didn't like the shirt I was wearing" I was doing laundry so I grabbed a shirt (brown button up) I never really wore because it was all I had clean. She came over and when I opened the door she immediately looked disgusted and said "Ew, what are you wearing?!" Which after my very reasonable "Uh, a shirt?" response turned into "I hate the way you dress and ew you didn't shave today. You look like a scumbag, WHAT WILL PEOPLE THINK OF ME WHEN THEY SEE ME WITH YOU!?!" It escalated very quickly when I said "Look, I'm sick of this. If you don't like the way I look, we shouldn't be dating. I'm fine with who I am." She grabbed a huge kitchen knife and alternately threatened me and herself with it. I grabbed her wrist and took the knife. Then she started screaming "THAT WAS ABUSE I AM CALLING THE COPS AND MY DAD." I told her "Call the cops, I don't give a fuck. Pretty sure you're allowed to hurt someone's wrist a little bit to get a knife away from them." She continued screaming a mix of all the things mentioned above. I repeatedly and calmly* told her that we shouldn't be together and she should leave. Finally she stormed off and left. 5 minutes later she was at my door sobbing "We're not really broken up are we!?!" Now, because I was an idiot who didn't understand the world and life I was like "Of course not" and let her cry on my shoulder. *I know when people tell these types of stories they are always the calm/rational/right one, but I'm dead serious when I say I was not yelling or trying to escalate things. This wasn't the first time she said shit about my clothes/appearance and I was just done. Didn't yell or instigate, just said "If that's the way you feel, why are you dating me? Please leave." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Out of Breath Records Posted April 29, 2014 Author Share Posted April 29, 2014 (brown button up) You bastard. jasonsheperdbfl 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bladewillisisdead Posted April 29, 2014 Share Posted April 29, 2014 You bastard. Yeah, in retrospect I was really asking for it. I haven't seen her in 6-7 years. Last contact I had with her was a few VERY angry texts maybe 5 years ago about never talking to anyone in her family ever again because I asked her little brother if he knew anyone who could sell me weed. It was a very desperate time. Around the 5th or 6th hour of looking for weed with your friends it gets to the point of "Fuck it, just call everyone." Calling her for her brother's number was the mistake. He was mad chill but was in the same weed situation I was. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Out of Breath Records Posted April 29, 2014 Author Share Posted April 29, 2014 Yeah, in retrospect I was really asking for it. I haven't seen her in 6-7 years. Last contact I had with her was a few VERY angry texts maybe 5 years ago about never talking to anyone in her family ever again because I asked her little brother if he knew anyone who could sell me weed. It was a very desperate time. Around the 5th or 6th hour of looking for weed with your friends it gets to the point of "Fuck it, just call everyone." Calling her for her brother's number was the mistake. He was mad chill but was in the same weed situation I was. Hahahahaha looking for weed. Damn that's hella dope. You should just call her and ask if she wants to bang. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bladewillisisdead Posted April 29, 2014 Share Posted April 29, 2014 The best part is I'm like 99% sure she ended up marrying the first dude she dated after we broke up. Oh yeah, she was SUPER against smoking weed. I went to visit my buddy at his college and she was all "Don't do drugs, drink, or hang out with any girls!" So of course within 30 minutes of arriving on campus we were in a car full of girls on our way to get beer. We picked the beer up at some dude's apartment and ended up smoking a shitload of weed. On the drive back she called me a bunch and just ignored my phone. Then my buddy riding shotgun answers his phone and goes "Hey Liz! Yeah, he's right here!" and hands me the phone. For the next ten minutes I think I said "I'm just really tired. No, I know I sound weird it's because I'm really tired!" about 100 times. I feel kinda shitty about lying, but she was ridiculous. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SBarry Posted April 29, 2014 Share Posted April 29, 2014 Not really a story but I always laugh way harder than I should at the fact one of my friends dated two different girls with the EXACT same name not long after the other. Shit blows my mind. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aflycon Posted April 29, 2014 Share Posted April 29, 2014 I'd like to take a moment to applaud you for actually saying to someone, "Call the cops, I don't give a fuck" Hardcore as fvx 10/10 Fridge Fox, Fairmount and KJL95 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Out of Breath Records Posted April 29, 2014 Author Share Posted April 29, 2014 LOL I AM TALKING TO THE GIRL IN MY ORIGINAL POST ON TINYCHAT BECAUSE SHE JUST READDED ME AFTER I POSTED THIS (WEIRD). She's still talking really ghetto, and she isn't stopping talking about horoscopes and shit I don't know why I'm dealing with this, it's late and I'm bored and this is golden. Update: She's talking about her hanging out with cholos and drinking meth laced vodka or something. Currently reading my horoscope to me, I hate that star shit and am not paying attention at all. caninesapien and Liimpan 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
noalarmplanet Posted April 29, 2014 Share Posted April 29, 2014 LOL I AM TALKING TO THE GIRL IN MY ORIGINAL POST ON TINYCHAT BECAUSE SHE JUST READDED ME AFTER I POSTED THIS (WEIRD). She's still talking really ghetto, and she isn't stopping talking about horoscopes and shit I don't know why I'm dealing with this, it's late and I'm bored and this is golden. Update: She's talking about her hanging out with cholos and drinking meth laced vodka or something. Currently reading my horoscope to me, I hate that star shit and am not paying attention at all. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
turnstiles Posted April 29, 2014 Share Posted April 29, 2014 Omg! I'm dying laughing. The brown button up, the audacity you had to wear that brown button up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Out of Breath Records Posted April 29, 2014 Author Share Posted April 29, 2014 She invited me to come over then asked if I was single/in an open relationship lol. Also wants to make music with me, which I'm down for since she's a fantastic musician. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tooclosetosee Posted April 29, 2014 Share Posted April 29, 2014 She invited me to come over then asked if I was single/in an open relationship lol. Also wants to make music with me, which I'm down for since she's a fantastic musician. make music or make sex? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Out of Breath Records Posted April 29, 2014 Author Share Posted April 29, 2014 make music or make sex? Apparently she has a black boyfriend from church who's name is Skye. She also asked if I was bi and seemed disappointed when I told her only for Ryan Gosling? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shelby Posted April 29, 2014 Share Posted April 29, 2014 Out of Breath Records 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rooks Posted April 29, 2014 Share Posted April 29, 2014 Apparently she has a black boyfriend from church who's name is Skye. She also asked if I was bi and seemed disappointed when I told her only for Ryan Gosling? BABY GOOOOOOOSE Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hippielauryn Posted April 29, 2014 Share Posted April 29, 2014 I once punched an ex boyfriend in the face because I found out he was cheating on me. Good times. diabretic, zacaroo21, piky0032 and 4 others 7 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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