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There Will Be Hell Toupée! (The Donald Trump Thread)


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EMPSTEAD, N.Y. (The Borowitz Report)—Plunging the future of the 2016 Presidential debates into doubt, Donald J. Trump said on Tuesday morning that he would not participate in the remaining two debates if Hillary Clinton is there.

Trump blasted the format of Monday night’s debate by claiming that the presence of Clinton was “specifically designed” to distract him from delivering his message to the American people.

“Every time I said something, she would say something back,” he said. “It was rigged.”

He also lambasted the “underhanded tactics” his opponent used during the debate. “She kept on bringing up things I said or did,” he added. “She is a very nasty person.”

Turning to CNN, Trump criticized the network’s use of a split screen showing both him and Clinton throughout the telecast. “It should have been just me,” he said. “That way people could have seen how really good my temperament is.”

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1 hour ago, ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ said:

LEster Holt is a registered Republican since 2003

but hey, that doesn't fit the false narrative, right?

so? lester holt works for and gets paid by a major hillary donor and supporter. if he does anything the network deems out of line his career could be over. i've been a registered independent since 2002. however, if i'm selected as moderator for a debate and repeatedly ask one candidate questions about their past, while giving the other candidate a complete pass, that would be neither fair nor balanced. there are also many in the GOP who have endorsed hillary, as well as former republican president george bush sr., because she is a continuation of failed middle eastern policies and coziness with countries like iran and saudi arabia who fill their pocketbooks. 

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It should be said that the Borowitz Report is satire. I half-believed those quotes for a second.

 

It's amazing, though, the extent to which Clinton got under Trump's skin with the Miss Universe thing. 

 

 

I love the image of Trump, awake at 5AM, sitting on the side of his gold-plated four-poster bed, wearing a $20,000 mink bathrobe, phone in hand, still absolutely fuming over Clinton using Machado as an example of his misogyny 5 days ago. It's the first thing he thought about this morning.

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7 minutes ago, AlexH. said:

It's amazing, though, the extent to which Clinton got under Trump's skin with the Miss Universe thing. 

the whole miss universe thing is a non-issue. homegirl is trash.

 

1 minute ago, abovetheearth said:

yes, it's satire. 

 

still a good read. 

3/10

Edited by WAXXX
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1 minute ago, abovetheearth said:

Clearly not an issue. id bet to say hes taking to it well by not even addressing it.

 

where is wife been this whole time?

melania? she's been around this whole time. you didn't hear that the dress she wore at the debates is all the rage?

http://www.usmagazine.com/stylish/news/melania-trumps-2645-presidential-debate-dress-sells-out-w442382

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20 minutes ago, WAXXX said:

the whole miss universe thing is a non-issue. homegirl is trash.

The whole doubling-down by Trump (and his supporters I guess) is just fascinating. As far as his actions being a reflection of his character, it really doesn't matter if homegirl is trash. The claim is that he treated her poorly, and that his behavior was sexist and racist. When confronted with this, he doesn't deny it or try to explain it - he just says yeah, well she sucked. And she did get fat! (she really didn't) He did the same thing when Clinton brought up the allegations that he's fucked over hundreds of small businesses - he implicitly confirmed them by saying maybe he didn't like the quality of work! Accused of racial discrimination? Eh, lots of other people got in trouble for it, and I didn't even admit guilt when I settled out of court! Rightly identified as leading the charge of birtherism, an implicitly racist conspiracy theory? Clinton started it! No? Well uh... I did Obama a favor by giving it a rest finally!

 

Trump is utterly disinterested to defend himself against charges that he's done shitty things - maybe simply because he's guilty and he knows it, but more likely it seems because he genuinely doesn't think they're shitty things (imagine the mind of someone who feels so justified about their longstanding feud with ROSIE O'DONNELL that they work it into their closing statement during a PRESIDENTIAL DEBATE). So his response is to simply attack the character of everyone not in his corner. To hear him tell it, the entire world is against him, he has never been in the wrong in his entire life, and yet somehow he's become very successful, tremendously successful actually, a huge success, and his son has computers and knows how to work the TV, it's amazing. This may work fine for his business, but it is not a good look for a president. It makes him look like a huge bully and a bigger whiner. Feel free to But Hillary all you want, the guy just is not qualified to be president. Dude is riding a smallish wave of divisiveness and fear, and in November when it crashes harmlessly against the shore of boring and uneven progress on the beach of politics as usual, I hope he gets a ton of sand in his hair, and I hope it gets real deep in his scalp, and after he takes a shower, there's still some in there.

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24 minutes ago, AlexH. said:

The whole doubling-down by Trump (and his supporters I guess) is just fascinating. As far as his actions being a reflection of his character, it really doesn't matter if homegirl is trash. The claim is that he treated her poorly, and that his behavior was sexist and racist. When confronted with this, he doesn't deny it or try to explain it - he just says yeah, well she sucked. And she did get fat! (she really didn't) He did the same thing when Clinton brought up the allegations that he's fucked over hundreds of small businesses - he implicitly confirmed them by saying maybe he didn't like the quality of work! Accused of racial discrimination? Eh, lots of other people got in trouble for it, and I didn't even admit guilt when I settled out of court! Rightly identified as leading the charge of birtherism, an implicitly racist conspiracy theory? Clinton started it! No? Well uh... I did Obama a favor by giving it a rest finally!

 

Trump is utterly disinterested to defend himself against charges that he's done shitty things - maybe simply because he's guilty and he knows it, but more likely it seems because he genuinely doesn't think they're shitty things (imagine the mind of someone who feels so justified about their longstanding feud with ROSIE O'DONNELL that they work it into their closing statement during a PRESIDENTIAL DEBATE). So his response is to simply attack the character of everyone not in his corner. To hear him tell it, the entire world is against him, he has never been in the wrong in his entire life, and yet somehow he's become very successful, tremendously successful actually, a huge success, and his son has computers and knows how to work the TV, it's amazing. This may work fine for his business, but it is not a good look for a president. It makes him look like a huge bully and a bigger whiner. Feel free to But Hillary all you want, the guy just is not qualified to be president. Dude is riding a smallish wave of divisiveness and fear, and in November when it crashes harmlessly against the shore of boring and uneven progress on the beach of politics as usual, I hope he gets a ton of sand in his hair, and I hope it gets real deep in his scalp, and after he takes a shower, there's still some in there.

homegirl's character does matter. it's her word against his, and she happens to be an extremely dubious and downright horrible person. her character is so bad that she wouldn't even be a reputable character witness in a court of law. hillary is the one who stooped so low as to even bring this person into a presidential debate. SAD!

 

regardless, all of this is a non-issue. trump won't be losing votes over this. he actually gained support from undecideds and millennials since the debates. at the end of the day, trump is the people's candidate and i still think he's going to win the election in a landslide.

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2 hours ago, Bladewillisisdead said:

If Trump is "the people's candidate" then I'm even more depressed about the state of the world and other humans than usual.

 

He's utter trash and you're truly deplorable if you cast your vote for him. Sorry, not sorry. Bye, Felicia.

it's this type of garbage drivel nonsense that is depressing. the fact that you openly detest people with differing opinions is the definition of bigotry. go vote for an anti-capitalist commie if you want, it's your right. however, it's your intolerance that is worrying. we can't just ban everything that you don't like. grow the fuck up.

Edited by WAXXX
wasn't nice
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