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I'm not even sure. Apparently the corporate manager thought I wasn't working up to standards and I had a poor work performance (which entirely isn't the case....from my understanding, all of the supervisors complemented me, my secret shopper evaluations were extremely positive, and I fucking bust my ass day in and day out, stay later, take extra shifts, way more than anyone else does, etc). And if it was the case, I never got any sort of warning or reprimand at all.

So they sent the HR lady from corporate down to fire me. I told her I was never made aware or warned that my work performance was in anyway lackluster. She seemed surprised to hear that and said she'd talk to Ivan (the manager from corporate who visits once every other month or so...he never did like me) and my supervisor about this. But she said to never hesitate to call her to have her be my reference for Juan Valdez and to just tell people I got let go due to downsizing(which she said was going to happen to the Philly chain) and assured me she'd tell potential employers I was a good worker. She's in all likelihood blowing smoke up my ass. I mean even if she could get me my job back by proving I was wrongfully fired I don't think I'd want it.

Fucking hell.

I'm filing for unemployment tomorrow, drinking heavily until Sunday. Then I'm going back to visit my family for a week and take some time to clear my head.

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That's shitty.

+I on the otherhand, am finally getting called to sub and I've picked up a few extra shifts at the ice rink so I might soon have spending money.

+ My student loan check should be coming soon so I can buy a new computer

+ Maybe I'll get the internet and TV at my house!

- Every so often the vinyl section of the board has nothing that really interests me for days. Now is one of those periods.

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- Went to the dentist for the first time in 2 years for a check up. For the first time in my life they found cavities and a bunch of them. They said because I have some crazy tooth anatomy and I had sealants, cavities developed in the deep grooves underneath the sealants so it wasn't my fault. But, this totally fucking sucks. I have to go back four more times for fillings. Seriously, could anything else make this week shittier?

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- Not feeling any better about this getting fired thing

- It's definitely feeding into my depression and my insecurities and abandonment issues

- I feel really fucking sick to my stomach.

+ I get to see Thursday tonight......

- however, I'm terrified because I'm a wreck right now I will end up getting a panic attack at the show.

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- one of the most intense, stressful days at work i have had every.

+/- just finished my project and feel glad its over, however im not even close to finishing my other one that is due in 21 mins :(

+ my free Club seat tickets to the Bucs / Panthers game showed up at work today. My dad is stoked im coming home to take him to a game with fancy tickets.

+ get to hang out wiht my girl tonight.

+ a bag should be waiting for me at the house :)

+ got no major plans this weekend... Just kicking it and relaxing!

- GF doesnt have rent money so i have to cover her this month.

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Guest markovianprocess

+++++ Ordered this sweet custom old school Game Boy for playing shows with. The case has been dyed red, splatter paint, a pro sound modification and a red backlight so I can see/play/write music in the dark. Pictures of the Game Boy and the backlight below. Should be here in a week or two!

http://8bitcollective.com/items/images/chrome.jpg

http://picasaweb.google.com/nonfinite/DualLEDRed#5328478494205756050

+ I'm getting a song featured on a tour compilation CD. Free publicity is awesome.

+ Possibly doing my first headline show next month.

+ Just finished up a new myspace (.com/sycamoredrive if anyone cares) layout

+ I am still so happy with how awesome my VC mystery boxes were. I managed to get a lot of albums I've been meaning to pick up.

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+ Saw The Steal's last ever show last night, Paint It Black played too...it was nuts! Dan Yemin was getting fully involved when The Steal were on, he was stagediving loads and even caught me a few times. he's a badass!!

- I am so bruised, battered and hungover today. My ankle is so swollen and I don't really know why.

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--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------- I got fucking fired today. It happened maybe 30 minutes ago. I'm in fucking shock. I've just now stopped crying. I kind of want to kill myself.

Shit, buddy...I haven't been on this section of the board lately and saw this. So sorry. Hope things get better for you soon, Nicole.

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