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I need help. I’m going on my first date tonight in over a year and a half, maybe even two years, I don't know. I say I need help because I was in a five year relationship straight out of high school, and when that ended I chose self-imposed solitude, up until now. I have no idea where to go or what questions are appropriate to ask, since usually most men who approach me in real life make me want to stick my head in an oven after I realize they’re just staring at my boobs, so I use sarcasm to scare them away.

so what do you men like to do? I don’t want to do the whole dinner movie thing, but he’s letting me decide and I have no clue.

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Do something that you get to interact with them, but it doesn't have to be constant. I think a hike would be good if you like the outdoors. You can talk to them, but it is also fine to be silent for a little bit and just walk. Getting tired and a little sweaty is a good way to get you to let your guard down without drinking.

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I always like bowling or mini-golf for a first date, not only because I suck at both, but it's the perfect environment to throw back a couple brews or just let your guard down. Unless you're with some ultra-competitive douchebag who's trying to shoot 3 under par at every hole and jams the scorecard in your face at the end of the night. Hopefully you're not with that guy ;)

Although with my current and long-time gf that's usually how our nights end up nowadays, only she's shoving her scorecard in my face because she's basically better at everything than me except video games and collecting records. And I shan't be dethroned!

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He's letting you decide? Lame, it's not the girls job to make the date. I just went on a first date with a girl ( my first GF from like 6th grade, actually) anyways, reds game, bar, fun time. It was great, and I took care of the planning, man job.

Exactly.

Seems like a nice thing to do. "I'm in for whatever you want to do". It just leads to that confusing/annoying conversation where neither side wants to make a decision.

I might say "You feeling any kind of food for dinner?" If she says "I don't know", I make a call. Keeps everything simple.

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Some people make a good point Madie. Don't you know anything about traditional gender roles? Your job is to make babies, not plans.

Well given that the guy saying "you choose a date" seems to have led exactly to the situation I said myself and most girls hate (indecision), I think it makes a point for my system of thinking.

If you think that the onus isn't on the guy to make the first move and put forth more effort early on, I disagree. It doesn't have to be that way, but it is what the large majority of girls expect. The opposite is the exception to the norm.

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