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i miss home so much.

 

its still there, just, im not. even when living in boston some days an 1hr and 30minutes felt too far. its more than just driving down and visiting. i really fucking miss it. ever since my car accident, everyday i think about how short life is and how quickly shit can change. i wanna be with my brother and my parents.

 

living in texas now for work. some days i almost cant take it. and just wanna quit and get the hell out of this shit state. when i first moved here, i bought the same aftershave my dad uses. i dont use it, just once in awhile i pop the top off and smell it. just reminds me so much of being home. 

 

i went to the zoo yesterday and i all could think about was going with my parents. like i would never think to do that, but thats all i wanted to do. 

I feel you. Not exactly the same situation, but Im from New York and go to school in Oregon for 9 months out of the year. Even though I  love it in Oregon, there are days or weeks where I'll miss home like hell and want to be back in New York and see my family and old friends. Familiarity is comforting.

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My 27 year old cousin was found dead this morning. He was struggling with alcoholism and depression. I'm a mess We grew up close and remained good friends. We tried to help but he shut us all out over the past year. Nothing got through despite a few moments where we thought there was hope.

I've been pulling back from the virtual social world over the past couple months. I think I'm done with this place, I've enjoyed focusing on the real world and realize I need my full attention there.

I'm sick of being a pall bearer, I'm ready to be a Best Man again. Peace.

This sucks, dude. Alcoholism is a serious thing. Keep your head up.

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i miss home so much.

its still there, just, im not. even when living in boston some days an 1hr and 30minutes felt too far. its more than just driving down and visiting. i really fucking miss it. ever since my car accident, everyday i think about how short life is and how quickly shit can change. i wanna be with my brother and my parents.

living in texas now for work. some days i almost cant take it. and just wanna quit and get the hell out of this shit state. when i first moved here, i bought the same aftershave my dad uses. i dont use it, just once in awhile i pop the top off and smell it. just reminds me so much of being home.

i went to the zoo yesterday and i all could think about was going with my parents. like i would never think to do that, but thats all i wanted to do.

I'm sure if I were anywhere but Austin id feel the same. Austin rules Texas sucks. My parents don't even live in my home state anymore. They moved to NC about 3 months before I moved to Austin In 2010

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hahaha this story is awesome. good work. wish we knew if he noticed/what happened afterwords.

 

 

that fucking suuuuucks. how much did you ditch?

 

i'd say it was about $30 worth. not the worst thing, but i just spent a ton of money this weekend, and probably can't afford to replace it right now

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heres a couple for you strangers...

 

The person that I consider to be my best friend and really the one constant in my life for the past 11 or so years I have never actually met but have talked to and texted nearly everyday for the past decade.  I may very well have been catfished before there was such a thing.  

 

I make very good money yet still live with my parents (who don't need my help financially or otherwise) because I don't want to live alone in this town now that all my friends here have moved on with their lives.   At the same time I am in a constant personal struggle to stay here although I would be much happier in a different city where I actually have friends and a life, but certain obligations placed on me by said family without ever consulting me makes leaving difficult.  I have always believed that doing what makes me happy should come first in my life but when faced with it, its hard for me to leave the people I care about disappointed.  

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My 27 year old cousin was found dead this morning. He was struggling with alcoholism and depression. I'm a mess We grew up close and remained good friends. We tried to help but he shut us all out over the past year. Nothing got through despite a few moments where we thought there was hope.

 

I've been pulling back from the virtual social world over the past couple months. I think I'm done with this place, I've enjoyed focusing on the real world and realize I need my full attention there. 

 

I'm sick of being a pall bearer, I'm ready to be a Best Man again. Peace. 

 

Sucks to hear man. Something good is bound to happen soon.

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heres a couple for you strangers...

 

The person that I consider to be my best friend and really the one constant in my life for the past 11 or so years I have never actually met but have talked to and texted nearly everyday for the past decade.  I may very well have been catfished before there was such a thing.  

 

let's hear more about this

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This might seem pretty weak but for the past 7 months I can't stop thinking about death and when I do I have a panic attack.

 

Ever since I became engaged I've hard the hardest time coping with death. The biggest thing I have a hard time dealing with is what happens when our time is up? Is there an after-life or does the light just turn off and thats it? 

 

It's hard for me to cope with the fact that you live this life and you come into contact with these people that you love and then all of a sudden it's over. 

 

You'd figure I should just keep my mind busy and not think about it, since I'm only 26 and have a lot of my life to live, but for some reason it creeps back into my head every now and then.

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This might seem pretty weak but for the past 7 months I can't stop thinking about death and when I do I have a panic attack.

Ever since I became engaged I've hard the har

dest time coping with death. The biggest thing I have a hard time dealing with is what happens when our time is up? Is there an after-life or does the light just turn off and thats it?

It's hard for me to cope with the fact that you live this life and you come into contact with these people that you love and then all of a sudden it's over.

You'd figure I should just keep my mind busy and not think about it, since I'm only 26 and have a lot of my life to live, but for some reason it creeps back into my head every now and then.

It's lights out.

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"To me, death is not a fearful thing. It's living that's treacherous"—crazy cult leader

"If we can't live in peace then we must die in peace"

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i try to not get too worked up about it, but I understand the feeling cause I totally get freaked out about it a lot too. i dont really know why though. because if, when we die, its just a lights off sorta thing, then we're nothing, we're not going to be aware of it, so why would it matter ya know? If we die and theres nothing and then we rot in the ground, we wont be like "Aw mannnn fuck, it really is just life on earth then its over"  because, obviously, we won't be existing to think about it. I dunno, it's weird for sure though.

 

edit: tl;dr, im probably too high

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let's hear more about this

 

Was kinda exaggerating about being catfished, but the thought has crossed my mind a few times since seeing that movie.  Since then I have seeing many pictures and such as proof of who I'm talking to (at least I think so?).  Funny thing is the very first picture she sent me was a random fake because I'm sure she never expected for us to end up anything close to actual friends.  

 

All started back when AOL chatrooms were big.  I would spend alot of time in one chatroom  with the same 20-30 people almost everyday.  Kept in touch with a few of the people for awhile during the Myspace days but in the end she's the only one I still talk to and probably knows me better than anyone.  I have never been against actually meeting her as I tried a couple times as I drove through her state but it just never happened.  Nothing strange or sexual about our relationship for those expecting a bigger confession here, just genuine friendship.

 

Not too weird just a little sad to admit that after 10+ yrs, we have never met.

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Was kinda exaggerating about being catfished, but the thought has crossed my mind a few times since seeing that movie. Since then I have seeing many pictures and such as proof of who I'm talking to (at least I think so?). Funny thing is the very first picture she sent me was a random fake because I'm sure she never expected for us to end up anything close to actual friends.

All started back when AOL chatrooms were big. I would spend alot of time in one chatroom with the same 20-30 people almost everyday. Kept in touch with a few of the people for awhile during the Myspace days but in the end she's the only one I still talk to and probably knows me better than anyone. I have never been against actually meeting her as I tried a couple times as I drove through her state but it just never happened. Nothing strange or sexual about our relationship for those expecting a bigger confession here, just genuine friendship.

Not too weird just a little sad to admit that after 10+ yrs, we have never met.

Wow, that's pretty awesome that you guys have kept in touch for so long, admirable to a certain degree. So are you ever going to consider meeting her in person? It seems almost like you may have given up on that notion.. I say you should go for it!
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- I haven't been on the boards in so fucking long

 

- last week I got drunk while watching MacGruber with a relatively new friend's ex gf who's also a new friend, and she ended up puking after the movie because I forgot my tolerance is way too fucking high and she tried to keep up (3 stella's, 3 shots of whiskey, and 1 shot of vodka)...I made her a bangin' grilled cheese and set up a trash can next to my bed, and had water ready for her for whenever she was to finish. While throwing up, I kept drinking bc, well, I was bored haha, but periodically checked on her.

 

After about an hour, I went out to my car to get my charger/secretly call my roommate to tell him whats going on...5 minutes in I received a text from her that said "i'm better, come lie down i dont kick " 

 

so, thinking it was time to crash (at this point I had 4 stellas/6 shots), I lied down next to her and closed my eyes. We were spooning and, well, I got a friggin boner and said, "ah damnit...I'm sorry" because, well, I didn't want to put ANY sort of pressure literally and figuratively haha. She turned around and within seconds my pants were off and her bra on my floor.

 

Boned twice/showered in between. 

 

did NOT expect that at all. 

 

and yes...she did brush her teeth before anything happened haha.

 

- I haven't been on the boards in so fucking long so there ya go

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