hippielauryn Posted February 6, 2014 Share Posted February 6, 2014 Just buy one of those real life sex dolls. No human interaction needed ever again! jtcohenour and deafening 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Team Avatar Posted February 6, 2014 Share Posted February 6, 2014 I'm really curious if they actually feel good. Around that good old masturbation age where you get horny at like every thought I needed something more so I googled ways to get off and some post online said you could fuck the area between your mattress and a heavy pillow or something like that. I know I tried it but it definitely didn't do the trick....... It's cool though that you can buy a fleshlight of your favorite pornstar. Get like the asa akira one, velcro strap, an ipad and a good POV and you're all set! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rip Posted February 6, 2014 Share Posted February 6, 2014 I'm really curious if they actually feel good. Around that good old masturbation age where you get horny at like every thought I needed something more so I googled ways to get off and some post online said you could fuck the area between your mattress and a heavy pillow or something like that. I know I tried it but it definitely didn't do the trick....... There was an episode of Nip/Tuck where a guy was obsessed with doing this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
radiatorhums Posted February 6, 2014 Share Posted February 6, 2014 Fleshlight now makes monster themed pocket vag's. Vampire, Cyborg etc. Obviously NSWF: http://io9.com/5847274/fleshlight-creates-vampire-frankenstein-zombie-and-cyborg-vaginas Should I be embarrassed that I've known this for a while? that made me start researching fleshlights. is it wrong that i kind of want to drop $50 of my tax return on one? would sure as hell save me on all these stupid fucking dates.. The idea of cleaning one of those out afterward ruins it for me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
deafening Posted February 6, 2014 Share Posted February 6, 2014 The idea of cleaning one of those out afterward ruins it for me. I don't know why I'm so surprised that this thought has never even occurred to me. I'm so intrigued. Does it come out and you turn it inside out to clean? Toys for boys sound like a lot of maintenance, and just makes me think of the story in Haunted by Chuck Palahniuk where the police officers all fucked the anatomically correct dolls. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
radiatorhums Posted February 6, 2014 Share Posted February 6, 2014 I don't know why I'm so surprised that this thought has never even occurred to me. I'm so intrigued. Does it come out and you turn it inside out to clean? Toys for boys sound like a lot of maintenance, and just makes me think of the story in Haunted by Chuck Palahniuk where the police officers all fucked the anatomically correct dolls. I got curious and looked it up. The video made me laugh quite a bit, Fleshlights appear to be a lot of work! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rip Posted February 6, 2014 Share Posted February 6, 2014 I got curious and looked it up. The video made me laugh quite a bit, Fleshlights appear to be a lot of work! My girlfriend makes me do this every time we finish. It's such a pain... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 6, 2014 Share Posted February 6, 2014 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nobodybrokeurheart Posted February 6, 2014 Share Posted February 6, 2014 that made me start researching fleshlights. is it wrong that i kind of want to drop $50 of my tax return on one? would sure as hell save me on all these stupid fucking dates.. i support this. mainly because i want to hear from a normal who actually does get laid how it feels compared to lady parts. i can't read "reviews" of it without laughing my ass off because the dudes just come off like they haven't been laid in years, their wife has left them, and this is all they have left. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GradedOnACurve Posted February 6, 2014 Share Posted February 6, 2014 I got curious and looked it up. The video made me laugh quite a bit, Fleshlights appear to be a lot of work! Oh lawd I could see this now. Friend: What ya got there on your counter? Fleshlight Owner: Just have my flashlight chillin out and drying Not weird at all. Also everything always sounds so not weird and nice when narrated by a British woman... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
castaway Posted February 6, 2014 Share Posted February 6, 2014 My brother and I used to live together but never really talked at all (we live completely different lives) I never even knew he had a flesh light and one day I just went in the bathroom and saw one chilling by the sink. I was weirded out and just went back to my room. Went back in 15 minutes later and it was gone. Never spoke a word to him about it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Team Avatar Posted February 6, 2014 Share Posted February 6, 2014 you had a small window of opportunity to use one and you didn't????????? COME ON Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Vool Posted February 6, 2014 Share Posted February 6, 2014 you had a small window of opportunity to use one and you didn't????????? COME ON The one your brother just jizzed in??? COME ON! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scottheisel Posted February 6, 2014 Share Posted February 6, 2014 The one your brother just jizzed in??? COME ON! It was freshly cleaned, COME ON! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GradedOnACurve Posted February 6, 2014 Share Posted February 6, 2014 Wouldn't it be COME IN??!! themeconspiracy 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Team Avatar Posted February 6, 2014 Share Posted February 6, 2014 I assume that someone elses jizz on the tip would feel the same as girls cum on the tip so if anything it'd feel better! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
piky0032 Posted February 6, 2014 Share Posted February 6, 2014 Dual Blumpkin? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Satan Posted March 31, 2014 Share Posted March 31, 2014 I haven't seen this pop up in a while, so I'm bringing it back to the top with all the glory this thread holds...with my 1,000th post. aflycon and jtcohenour 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Team Avatar Posted March 31, 2014 Share Posted March 31, 2014 I went down on a girl who was a virgin - and I didn't know this at the time, because when I went to the bathroom to wash up after my hands were covered in dried blood, meaning, well, yeah. She was also not trimmed and that just isn't fun then, its yucky. anddddddd icing on the cake, not that there is an obligation but I got nothing in return. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 31, 2014 Share Posted March 31, 2014 dude! i had sexy time with a very attractive lady last night. we met a couple months ago, had a little impromptu date a few weeks back. she came to the party i had last night, and after a heavy make out sesh on the porch, i got the invite to go back to her place. also went down on her. also not trimmed. also didn't get anything in return. well, until this morning when i got a handy. but despite all that, and not actually having sex, the whole thing was incredibly hot. she also has the sexiest voice which just kind of puts me over the edge. funny part to the story.. while we were making out here, my friend just kind of stumbled on to the porch, and found himself in a slightly awkward situation. he handled this by giving me a light back-hand to the groin. the moment that he realized that i was, well, slightly aroused- oh man, we just died laughing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abovetheearth Posted March 31, 2014 Share Posted March 31, 2014 I went down on a girl who was a virgin - and I didn't know this at the time, because when I went to the bathroom to wash up after my hands were covered in dried blood, meaning, well, yeah. She was also not trimmed and that just isn't fun then, its yucky. anddddddd icing on the cake, not that there is an obligation but I got nothing in return. The Vool, cbbrew22, jtcohenour and 1 other 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Satan Posted March 31, 2014 Share Posted March 31, 2014 I went down on a girl who was a virgin - and I didn't know this at the time, because when I went to the bathroom to wash up after my hands were covered in dried blood, meaning, well, yeah. She was also not trimmed and that just isn't fun then, its yucky. anddddddd icing on the cake, not that there is an obligation but I got nothing in return. Oh man, that is very very unfortunate. Storytime! So, I was on okcupid in January and whatnot. i met this chick and well, I kept getting teaser pictures from her on my phone while I was at work. So like any norimal person, I called my boss and told him the deal. He knew what was up and let me leave early to go get some poon. I get over there and she's just in her underwear, with a beer in her hand, and had a beer waiting for me. Move forward. She REALLY. liked giving head. I'd describe her like a vacuum cleaner for the peen. Move forward a little bit, to only find that she's a submissive who likes things really rough. This was great for me, because I'm completely dominant and rough. Seriously, I could wind up like a batter with my hand and smack her ass until it was blood red and she'd still ask for more. It was fantastic. So the sex happened (ball gag. riding crop, bondage rope, etc...) I made her squirt twice. I was amazed and my face lit up like a kid on christmas because it was a first. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rip Posted March 31, 2014 Share Posted March 31, 2014 This was absolutely perfect. I laughed for about 5 minutes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Team Avatar Posted March 31, 2014 Share Posted March 31, 2014 Oh man, that is very very unfortunate. Storytime! So, I was on okcupid in January and whatnot. i met this chick and well, I kept getting teaser pictures from her on my phone while I was at work. So like any norimal person, I called my boss and told him the deal. He knew what was up and let me leave early to go get some poon. I get over there and she's just in her underwear, with a beer in her hand, and had a beer waiting for me. Move forward. She REALLY. liked giving head. I'd describe her like a vacuum cleaner for the peen. Move forward a little bit, to only find that she's a submissive who likes things really rough. This was great for me, because I'm completely dominant and rough. Seriously, I could wind up like a batter with my hand and smack her ass until it was blood red and she'd still ask for more. It was fantastic. So the sex happened (ball gag. riding crop, bondage rope, etc...) I made her squirt twice. I was amazed and my face lit up like a kid on christmas because it was a first. this guy is, lets just say, jealous Satan and Out of Breath Records 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Vool Posted March 31, 2014 Share Posted March 31, 2014 I get over there and she's just in her underwear, with a beer in her hand, and had a beer waiting for me. I stopped reading after this sentence...BEST GIRL EVER! Regardless of what she was wearing... jtcohenour 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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