pez Posted February 4, 2009 Share Posted February 4, 2009 oh man, this site is great I like this one Today, I was playing with 3 kids I look after. The middle one has just learned about sex and started chanting that I had done it with the eldest as a joke. We were in the garden and the neighbours heard. Now I am fired, have to leave the house and am being investigated by the police. FML Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest vito Posted February 4, 2009 Share Posted February 4, 2009 Today, I had dinner on my own. My cat came and sat on the chair on the other side of the table. We stared at each other during the whole meal. Pathetic. FML hahah jon arbuckle much? no kidding. the imagery i get with this one is astounding. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest xsteponmex Posted February 6, 2009 Share Posted February 6, 2009 "Today, I made a Craigslist ad looking for hot and horny women that wanted some. I only got one reply, from another guy asking me if this kind of thing actually works. FML" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
destroyingthescene Posted February 7, 2009 Share Posted February 7, 2009 Other people's misery makes me laugh! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xxfesterxx Posted February 7, 2009 Share Posted February 7, 2009 Today, my boyfriend of 2 years sent me a text messages saying, "Don't worry I'm gonna break up with her soon. Love you." FML Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xxfesterxx Posted February 7, 2009 Share Posted February 7, 2009 Today, I decided to send my boyfriend a pic text of me naked. I accidently sent it to my dad and got a text back saying "You definitely take after your mom". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xxfesterxx Posted February 7, 2009 Share Posted February 7, 2009 sorry this is the last one Today, I was eating ice cream and I noticed some on my jeans so I wiped it off with my finger and licked it. It was bird shit. FML Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brennan Posted February 8, 2009 Share Posted February 8, 2009 those are fucking hilarious. god i wish things like this happened in real life more often. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pacoconut Posted February 8, 2009 Share Posted February 8, 2009 this is the best website i've heard of in recent history, hahaha Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xxfesterxx Posted February 8, 2009 Share Posted February 8, 2009 Today, I accidentally unplugged my headphones in the quiet section of the library, causing my music to play from my laptop at full volume. I was listening to Celine Dion. I'm the captain of the football team. FML Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
toymakanik Posted February 9, 2009 Share Posted February 9, 2009 Today, on my way home from watching a movie with a girl, I began having an erection because I thought I could kiss her goodnight. She dropped me off at home, and with my full blown erection, I walked in front of her car with the headlights on. FML Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
partysmasher Posted February 9, 2009 Share Posted February 9, 2009 Gotta wonder if Scott who used to drum for Blink 182 might be driven to post on this website... “Some band I left when I was 20 have just reformed, they’re already multi millionaires and are about to make a load more cash, I clean carpets for a living. The new drummer plays my stuff better than I used to. FML” Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pjaicomo Posted February 9, 2009 Share Posted February 9, 2009 Gotta wonder if Scott who used to drum for Blink 182 might be driven to post on this website...“Some band I left when I was 20 have just reformed, they’re already multi millionaires and are about to make a load more cash, I clean carpets for a living. The new drummer plays my stuff better than I used to. FML” I wish I had stayed with them and dragged them down with me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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