littlejonnyhormone Posted February 9, 2009 Share Posted February 9, 2009 Shit son. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
littlejonnyhormone Posted February 9, 2009 Share Posted February 9, 2009 Dan, I think she is pretty set on him right now. They're going to California together over spring break I guess. I think I just have to let it go slowly. It just bugs the shit out of me that this still bothers me. They are from eastern PA, and I think she is moving to Pittsburgh this summer. So I guess I can just stay close and see what happens? I did say something to her last year around this time, and thats what started the whole awkward phase. It didn't go over well. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
danthemjfan23 Posted February 9, 2009 Author Share Posted February 9, 2009 oh, well see i didn't know that. i'm gonna need that sort of information to give informed advice. sounds like it's time to move on, though. and there's only two ways to do that, too. 1. start hanging out with new friends anyway, because if you're hanging out with her all the time, you'll only fall more and more in love with her. every time she tells a cute little joke, you'll appreciate her humor. every time she bends over to pick up the ping pong ball from the ground, you'll realize how hot she is. every time she kisses her bf, you'll wish it was you. you gotta start hanging out with new people and eventually you'll think less and less of her, and what you think you're missing out on. win/lose. 2. get a girlfriend of you own, and you can still hang out with them. you'll be happy with your own girlfriend, and you won't have to lose the other friends you already have deeply-seeded relationships with. win/win. also, you never answered my question about whether or not you guys actually messed around when you were spending the nights in her room. don't dodge the question. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest vito Posted February 9, 2009 Share Posted February 9, 2009 This might seem like a fairly obvious question but what's a good way to meet people? I'm currently not going to school so that doesn't really work for me and my town doesn't get a lot of shows. I've made some good friends over the past few months through mutual friends but I still feel like something is missing (a girlfriend-quality female). Any thoughts? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
andrew13 Posted February 9, 2009 Share Posted February 9, 2009 tell her to swallow about a tablespoon of honey before she blows you. whenever i do that, the cum always just flows right down my throat and i can barely taste it. it's a neat little trick i picked up back in '03. this had me laughing so hard at work when i saw it, i was almost crying. good thing it was dead all night. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
littlejonnyhormone Posted February 9, 2009 Share Posted February 9, 2009 oh, well see i didn't know that. i'm gonna need that sort of information to give informed advice. sounds like it's time to move on, though. and there's only two ways to do that, too. 1. start hanging out with new friends anyway, because if you're hanging out with her all the time, you'll only fall more and more in love with her. every time she tells a cute little joke, you'll appreciate her humor. every time she bends over to pick up the ping pong ball from the ground, you'll realize how hot she is. every time she kisses her bf, you'll wish it was you. you gotta start hanging out with new people and eventually you'll think less and less of her, and what you think you're missing out on. win/lose. 2. get a girlfriend of you own, and you can still hang out with them. you'll be happy with your own girlfriend, and you won't have to lose the other friends you already have deeply-seeded relationships with. win/win. also, you never answered my question about whether or not you guys actually messed around when you were spending the nights in her room. don't dodge the question. We didn't really mess around, but we slept with each other, and we stayed pretty close to each other. We made physical contact, but nothing to note. If that makes sense? And yeah, I've had other girlfriends since then but they have felt inferior so far. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
danthemjfan23 Posted February 9, 2009 Author Share Posted February 9, 2009 This might seem like a fairly obvious question but what's a good way to meet people? I'm currently not going to school so that doesn't really work for me and my town doesn't get a lot of shows. I've made some good friends over the past few months through mutual friends but I still feel like something is missing (a girlfriend-quality female). Any thoughts? how old are you? what type of girlfriend are you looking for? long-term to the point where maybe you'd marry her? or short-term that you would just mess around a few months and move on? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest smccown13 Posted February 9, 2009 Share Posted February 9, 2009 I think I have a good question. I haven't had sex in like a year, and honestly I think I forgot how to do it. I met this girl and I really don't want to seem lame ya know. What should I do? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
littlejonnyhormone Posted February 9, 2009 Share Posted February 9, 2009 I think I have a good question. I haven't had sex in like a year, and honestly I think I forgot how to do it. I met this girl and I really don't want to seem lame ya know. What should I do? You have a peepee. She has a vag. You put your peepee in her vag. Maybe we should leave this for Dan. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
danthemjfan23 Posted February 9, 2009 Author Share Posted February 9, 2009 I think I have a good question. I haven't had sex in like a year, and honestly I think I forgot how to do it. I met this girl and I really don't want to seem lame ya know. What should I do? tell her you're a virgin. i think technically you are anyway. i heard they grow back after about 8-10 months or so. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest smccown13 Posted February 9, 2009 Share Posted February 9, 2009 I think I have a good question. I haven't had sex in like a year, and honestly I think I forgot how to do it. I met this girl and I really don't want to seem lame ya know. What should I do? tell her you're a virgin. i think technically you are anyway. i heard they grow back after about 8-10 months or so. Thanks. I didn't want to take the warm liver in a mason jar/sex doll route. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
danthemjfan23 Posted February 9, 2009 Author Share Posted February 9, 2009 I didn't want to take the warm liver in a mason jar/sex doll route. they're pretty expensive, too. at least, the good ones are. http://www.realdoll.com/cgi-bin/snav.rd?action=viewpage§ion=frealdoll&category=dolls but hey, at least shipping is free. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest smccown13 Posted February 9, 2009 Share Posted February 9, 2009 I didn't want to take the warm liver in a mason jar/sex doll route. they're pretty expensive, too. at least, the good ones are. http://www.realdoll.com/cgi-bin/snav.rd?action=viewpage§ion=frealdoll&category=dolls but hey, at least shipping is free. Reminds me of that episode of nip/tuck. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest vito Posted February 9, 2009 Share Posted February 9, 2009 This might seem like a fairly obvious question but what's a good way to meet people? I'm currently not going to school so that doesn't really work for me and my town doesn't get a lot of shows. I've made some good friends over the past few months through mutual friends but I still feel like something is missing (a girlfriend-quality female). Any thoughts? how old are you? what type of girlfriend are you looking for? long-term to the point where maybe you'd marry her? or short-term that you would just mess around a few months and move on? I am 21. I'm glad you brought that up though, I know I'm not ready to settle down any time soon. My background: Basically, in the past year I ended a four year relationship because I knew I didn't want to be with her in the long run; it was for the best. Immediately afterward, I had a two-month rebound which ended pretty badly. This was almost six months ago. In all honestly, I am looking for something more meaningful then just messing around. But most of all, I just someone to hang out with and talk to. I have quite a few good friends, a few of which are female but I think I need to be more than 'just friends'. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
controlthebleeding Posted February 9, 2009 Share Posted February 9, 2009 I didn't want to take the warm liver in a mason jar/sex doll route. they're pretty expensive, too. at least, the good ones are. http://www.realdoll.com/cgi-bin/snav.rd?action=viewpage§ion=frealdoll&category=dolls but hey, at least shipping is free. if i was fucking loaded i'd buy one of those toy dolls and prop her up by a grand piano (because if i could afford a DOLL of her caliber i sure as hell would have bought a piano by that time... or maybe in the fridge to see what people would say when they opened it..lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
danthemjfan23 Posted February 9, 2009 Author Share Posted February 9, 2009 vito i just had a really long response typed out and when i hit send the page didn't load and i lost everything. i'll try to recreate it but it won't be nearly as witty because i'm pissed. i talked about how i always order your sandwich when i go to jimmy johns, but now i realize you probably don't even know what that is since you're from canada. google it. okay, so it sounds to me like you already have a few of your girl friends in mind with whom you would like to be more than 'just friends.' this is good. again, though, like i said to somebody earlier, you have to be prepared to lose that friendship eventually in case things don't work out. hopefully that won't be the case, but you just need to be aware of the fact that it's a possibility. okay, since you are friends with them, you should be in much better shape than somebody they would meet at a bar. you already know things about them. you know their likes, their dislikes. hopefully they have confided in you things about their previous boyfriends that they liked/didn't like, and you committed those comments to memory. if not, you need to pay more attention to girls when they talk. pick one of your friends that you're particularly fond of and ask them to spend a day together with you (just the two of you). does one of them like jazz? take her to that bar that plays live jazz every tuesday. does one of them paint? take her to the art museum. does one of them like hockey? of course, you live in fucking canada. take her to a game. be creative, because the actual event doesn't make a difference. whatever you do, just make sure that you're doing something that shows you've taken an interest in her particularly and that you've paid attention to her wants/needs. she'll be impressed you care that much. at the end of the date when you drive her home, if she asks you in, be strong and say no. tell her something like "i really want to, i know that much, but i don't want to do anything on impulse that might screw things up for later." she'll be schocked at first, but you just planted an incredibly potent seed in her tiny little woman brain. the 'goodbye' immediately following your rejection of her offer will be awkward, but deal with it as best you can. you may have lost the battle, but you'll win the war. for sure. over the next 5 days, she's going to call every friend she's ever known and ask them what your motive could have POSSIBLY been for turning her down. she'll come to realize that you are actually really sweet and caring and thoughtful and sensitive and all that other shit that girls love. she'll get tons of advice from all of her friends over those 5 days as to how to handle the situation, but none of it matters. what matters is that you've been on her brain for 5 days straight, and that all she's been thinking about is how bad she wishes you would have just come in. also, by you saying you "don't want to screw things up for later" you're telling her that you've thought about "later" and that you want to have a "later" with her. she's going to like that you are looking for more than just a quick lay and that you didn't just call her because you were too lazy to try to pick somebody up at the bar. call her up after a few days and make plans with her again for the next weekend. if you have a day date (cuter, less pressure involved), have another great time with her. take her to a place that YOU want to go to. are you into anything in particular? live music? take her to a park that plays free shows during the weekdays. whatever you do, take her someplace that shows your interests, and shows her that you want to share those things with her. at the end of the date, tell her you've had another really great time with her, but that you don't want the date to end. ask her out to dinner that night. she'll either say yes and then boom you're golden. or she'll say "i feel kind of gross, i want to go back and shower" to which you reply "oh of course i kind of want to, too." you'll be picking her up at 5:45. if you have a night date with her, try to feel out during the date how well things are going and whether or not she's going to invite you inside again. chances are that she won't (because she won't want to get rejected again) but that she wants to. so you make the move on this one. invite her back to your place for a movie or a couple drinks or something. she will, of course, say yes. play your cards right, don't rush things. do NOT fuck her that night. just make out with her. don't even let her give you a beej. trust me. the suspense/thrill will kill her, and you're again just planting that seed for later. the next few days all she'll be able to think about is how much she wanted to do more with you but how she respects that you don't want to ruin anything. god, you're such a sweet guy. how has she never noticed this before? you'll be living together by june. 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littlejonnyhormone Posted February 9, 2009 Share Posted February 9, 2009 DAN. DOES. NOT. QUIT. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
divaface Posted February 9, 2009 Share Posted February 9, 2009 maybe dan's actually a chick and that's how he knows our secrets. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
danthemjfan23 Posted February 9, 2009 Author Share Posted February 9, 2009 as long as i have fans out there (it doesn't matter what time of day/night), i'll aim to please... besides i'm listening to a badass live set from jawbreaker in 1990 that i just found on the interwebz... no way i'm going to sleep now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
littlejonnyhormone Posted February 9, 2009 Share Posted February 9, 2009 Did you see my last response regarding my situation? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
danthemjfan23 Posted February 9, 2009 Author Share Posted February 9, 2009 maybe dan's actually a chick and that's how he knows our secrets. are you admitting that my advice would work on you? why aren't you asleep? i thought you were going to bed before. wanna play? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
danthemjfan23 Posted February 9, 2009 Author Share Posted February 9, 2009 Did you see my last response regarding my situation? yeah, i only asked cause i was curious, not cause i was gonna give you different advice. if you're looking for some, though, this would be it: date one of her really good friends. be UNBELIEVABLY good to that friend. all she'll do is talk about how great of a bf you are to her. jealous girl = girl you'll be dating before you know it. OR stop comparing the girls you date to her, because none of them are her. you're always going to try to find flaws in girls because really the only one you think you want is her, and none of them will be able to live up to the impossible pedistal you have placed her on. you will never be happy if you keep doing this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
divaface Posted February 9, 2009 Share Posted February 9, 2009 maybe dan's actually a chick and that's how he knows our secrets. are you admitting that my advice would work on you? why aren't you asleep? i thought you were going to bed before. wanna play? i've been involved in one strikingly similar situation described within this post and it worked like a charm. i did go to bed but not to sleep. i need to invest in some breathe right strips. sure. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
littlejonnyhormone Posted February 9, 2009 Share Posted February 9, 2009 THANKS DR. DAN! I have a better situation/story that I can go on about tomorrow. For now, I'm out for the night. Class at noon, gotta get at least 6 hours of sleep in. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
controlthebleeding Posted February 9, 2009 Share Posted February 9, 2009 you'll be living together by june. i laughed my ass off at this.. actually his advice does make sense. i did the exact same thing once to a girl i dated and while i did say no, it wasn't because i had a plan all along. i am just a really nice guy so i wanted to wait... sure enough, the 2nd time around i asked her to my place to watch a movie.. we watched SALO and within 20 minutes she was giving me a hj and within 30 i had my thumb in her ass.... good times!!! 1 week later she fucking bled all over my sheets, so i kicked her out. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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