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- I've noticed I get angry really easy lately. I throw my controllers around when I game, and cuss and scream at my TV. I also got an attitude with people on the hone at work, something I never do, and had 3 people tell me they are going to file a complaint on me last time I worked. It's weird, I've always had a short fuse, but I've been able to control it a lot better then I am right now.

- Ever since my panic attack in the MRI yesterday I've been feeling really on edge, like I used to when my anxiety problems started. Hopefully I don't regress to that state again.

- I start my internship in the morning tomorrow. I'm pretty nervous, even though I'm just doing software and wireless fixes on student computers.

+ Long weekend, and I'm not working the holiday for once!

+ Going to look at a house that looked awesome as hell from the outside.

- There's been so much violence going on around my neighborhood lately, it's sickening what people do. 2 murders in 3 days is pretty rare for a city that only has a dozen or so a year, and there are none fatal shootings every damn day.

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- I'm pretty sure I'm going to drop my internship class and find my own for the spring. I seriously sat for 4 hours doing nothing. I'm not allowed to do anything but fix laptops, and only one person brought one in today and the guy started on it and was like "oh, maybe I should have had you do this." and kept working. It's a waste of my time, and I'm not learning shit.

- Fuck it's hot outside.

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Depending on where you live off Portage Path, you could live really damn close to me.

- Hung over as shit, which sucks since I only had a few drinks last night.

- My lower back is killing me, and it's radiating down my legs. My right hand also kills, again.

+ No work tomorrow, drinking all day long.

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- Playing COD MW2 multiplayer is so irritating. I really should buy Black Ops. In MW2 everyone is running around with grenade launchers and shotguns so you die every 3 seconds. I even have good games with a positive ratio and I've died 18 times. It's too fast-paced and my blood pressure rises while playing it.

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- Playing COD MW2 multiplayer is so irritating. I really should buy Black Ops. In MW2 everyone is running around with grenade launchers and shotguns so you die every 3 seconds. I even have good games with a positive ratio and I've died 18 times. It's too fast-paced and my blood pressure rises while playing it.

I broke yet another controller while playing Battlefield Bad Company 2 today. Hah

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-- Holy shit my legs and lower back hurt. I went to the bars and was standing the whole time, and I seriously feel like I'm going to collapse the pain is so bad it's making my shit feel weak.

+ I'm going to try to go buy new shoes and good inserts tomorrow, and see if that helps a little bit.

+ A little tipsy now.

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+ another birthday

+ since I'm going thru a divorce, birthday = an extra day with my son

- found a dove in my back yard with a broken wing

- helped said dove to a warm area and bandaged the wing only to find it gone 15 minutes later

- had to drop my son off to his mother's new apartment for the first overnight visit ever in our joint custody arrangement

- won't see my son until Thursday afternoon, the worst thought ever...he's two and he rules

- happy fucking birthday to me

+ just cracked a beer

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- Woke up with pain in my shoulder that is radiating down my arm, again. This is like the third time in a few months.

+ Dropping my internship and have a potential good one for the spring. I'm not going to learn shit at the one I'm doing now, so I don't mind putting off graduation another semester.

+ Played euchre for a few hours last night, first tme in like a year, and it was a good time.

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Guest markovianprocess

--- I've got to stretch out these last few sections over the next 3 weeks from 7,500 to 13,500 meaningful words, which is still 10% lower than the recommended length for the thesis. It's a bit unfair that I've essentially been given half the time everyone else has had because I wanted to do an original experiment (so I had to wait for various levels of ethical clearance and wasn't allowed to start on anything until I had that). I need to stop thinking that it matters whether these things are actually interesting. I'm giving myself headaches being under all of this stress.

+ At least I get to leave the house tomorrow. I've been stuck in my house in a box room the last two days because of plastering work. Planning to stay out for as long as possible.

[EDIT]

+++ I had such a positive hard working sort of day. I managed to get 2,100 words down, all good stuff, and I had fun doing it too since one of my friends from the course Alistair was around to chat with. Done about half of that on an original analysis of government press release headlines and article taglines. If I can keep up this pace and quality, I think it's likely that I could have a finished draft done for Sunday. I've only got 4,000 words to go, after all.

+ I got done so quickly that I just got to chill out for the whole night watching Louie.

+ The library is back open till 7pm tomorrow, so I'm going to spend like 10 hours there. If I get bored, I've got a few CDs to review.

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