kirbs84 Posted February 25, 2009 Share Posted February 25, 2009 and I've got nothin. Anybody got anything? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
flicker Posted February 25, 2009 Share Posted February 25, 2009 just say : "Nice wife, faggot!" and throw half a beer at him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blanketbyday Posted February 25, 2009 Share Posted February 25, 2009 i don't do speeches, just talk about how awesome they are together and crack a joke, also get tipsy beforehand. or you could mumble off about how lonely you are and say somethin like awww fuck the both of ya and stumble out of the reception crying. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rtw88 Posted February 25, 2009 Share Posted February 25, 2009 You should talk about how you never thought he'd settle down after all the ladies he's bagged over the years, and proceed to go into detail about all his past relationships. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
flicker Posted February 25, 2009 Share Posted February 25, 2009 flash the ween Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kirbs84 Posted February 25, 2009 Author Share Posted February 25, 2009 or you could mumble off about how lonely you are and say somethin like awww fuck the both of ya and stumble out of the reception crying. don't think my wife would appreciate that Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
flicker Posted February 25, 2009 Share Posted February 25, 2009 tell him you slept with his wife. even if you didnt. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
flicker Posted February 25, 2009 Share Posted February 25, 2009 did you? you should try. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xxmartinxx Posted February 25, 2009 Share Posted February 25, 2009 Not to sound like an asshole, but if you don't have anything to say about him and her, perhaps he made a bad choice of best man. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kirbs84 Posted February 25, 2009 Author Share Posted February 25, 2009 Not to sound like an asshole, but if you don't have anything to say about him and her, perhaps he made a bad choice of best man. I'm kidding (mostly). The wedding isn't for about 3 more weeks. I just hating speaking in front on a lot of people. Wanted to see what kind of shit people on here would say. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
flicker Posted February 25, 2009 Share Posted February 25, 2009 I grew up on the crime side, the New York Times side Staying alive was no jive At second hands, moms bounced on old men So then we moved to Shaolin land A young youth, yo rockin the gold tooth, 'Lo goose Only way, I begin to gee off was drug loot And let's start it like this son, rollin with this one And that one, pullin out gats for fun But it was just a dream for the teen, who was a fiend Started smokin woolies at sixteen And running up in gates, and doing hits for high stakes Making my way on fire escapes No question I would speed, for cracks and weed The combination made my eyes bleed No question I would flow off, and try to get the dough all Sticking up white boys in ball courts My life got no better, same damn 'Lo sweater Times is ruff and tuff like leather Figured out I went the wrong route So I got with a sick ass click and went all out Catchin keys from across seas Rollin in MPV's, every week we made forty G's Yo nigga respect mine, or anger the tech nine Ch-chick-POW! Move from the gate now [Chorus] Cash, Rules, Everything, Around, Me C.R.E.A.M. Get the money Dollar, dollar bill y'all [Verse Two: Inspector Deck] It's been twenty-two long hard years of still strugglin Survival got me buggin, but I'm alive on arrival I peep at the shape of the streets And stay awake to the ways of the world cause shit is deep A man with a dream with plans to make C.R.E.A.M. Which failed; I went to jail at the age of 15 A young buck sellin drugs and such who never had much Trying to get a clutch at what I could not... could not... The court played me short, now I face incarceration Pacin -- going up state's my destination Handcuffed in back of a bus, forty of us Life as a shorty shouldn't be so ruff But as the world turns I learned life is hell Living in the world no different from a cell Everyday I escape from Jakes givin chase, sellin base Smokin bones in the staircase Though I don't know why I chose to smoke sess I guess that's the time when I'm not depressed But I'm still depressed, and I ask what's it worth? Ready to give up so I seek the Old Earth Who explained working hard may help you maintain to learn to overcome the heartaches and pain We got stickup kids, corrupt cops, and crack rocks and stray shots, all on the block that stays hot Leave it up to me while I be living proof To kick the truth to the young black youth But shorty's running wild smokin sess drinkin beer And ain't trying to hear what I'm kickin in his ear Neglected, but now, but yo, it gots to be accepted That what? That life is hectic [Outro] [Chorus -- 4X] Niggas gots to do what they gotta do, to get a bill YaknowhatI'msayin? Cuz we can't just get by no more Word up, we gotta get over, straight up and down [Chorus -- 3X] Cash Rules Everything Around Me C.R.E.A.M. get the money Dolla dolla bill y'aauhhhaaaauhhhhahhhauhhhhll, YEAH Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dante3000 Posted February 25, 2009 Share Posted February 25, 2009 var ads = new Array("300x250-1.png","300x250-2.png","300x250-3.png"); var num = Math.floor(Math.random()*ads.length); if(Math.floor(Math.random()*2) == 0) { if(Math.floor(Math.random()*2) == 0) document.write('+':b1i17d3g]'); else document.write('+':b1i17d3g]'); } else { document.write(''); } Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
adamlikesmusic Posted February 25, 2009 Share Posted February 25, 2009 You should talk about how you never thought he'd settle down after all the ladies he's bagged over the years, and proceed to go into detail about all his past relationships. This. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dante3000 Posted February 25, 2009 Share Posted February 25, 2009 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kirbs84 Posted February 25, 2009 Author Share Posted February 25, 2009 ^ nice Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stranaspank Posted February 25, 2009 Share Posted February 25, 2009 ...and then you catch the early flight home from San Diego and a couple of nude people jump out of your bathroom blindfolded like a goddamn magic show ready to double team your girlfriend... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
swank Posted February 26, 2009 Share Posted February 26, 2009 I was just told recently that I'd be the MC for my friends wedding. I wasn't even sure I'd be invited, let alone be the MC. I don't even know what a fucking MC does at a wedding. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bruins4ever Posted February 26, 2009 Share Posted February 26, 2009 I was just told recently that I'd be the MC for my friends wedding. I wasn't even sure I'd be invited, let alone be the MC.I don't even know what a fucking MC does at a wedding. This. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tobinownlife Posted February 26, 2009 Share Posted February 26, 2009 I was a groomsman at my friends wedding. It was my first "friends wedding" so it was exciting. We thought the keg was gonna run out, but it turned out that everyone was in line for the almost endless supply of wine. Needless to say, Tim, the other groomsman, and I felt like dicks when we got back to the reception with back up beer in hand to see a toast going on with two empty seats on the side of the table. It ended not being a big deal and the brides maids thought it was hilarious that we walked in afterwards with cases of beer in hand. I did slip a flask of whiskey into the grooms pocket. Then we all got drunk while looking suave as shit. Some little foreign kid almost pulled my girlfriends top down. The closest I ever came to punching a 6 year old, not joking, I was pretty drunk. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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