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Vaginyl Collective Redux (Men view at their own risk).


-tess.
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GOOD!

 

also, i don't even know why red lobster serves actual food. i would eat the cheesy biscuits for an entire meal.

extra tips for any member of the wait staff who brings me biscuits to go at the end of the meal, too.

 

Red Lobster has cheesy biscuts?  Can I just order a couple dozen?

 

Cheesy biscuts and jalapeno cornbread are two things my life sorely lacks right now.

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Red Lobster has cheesy biscuts?  Can I just order a couple dozen?

 

Cheesy biscuts and jalapeno cornbread are two things my life sorely lacks right now.

 

actually, YES!

 

you can just go in and go up to the bar and order some to go. i know this because my sister makes my brother-in-law do it all the time for her, haha.

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I serrrrriiiiiiously need to get back on the working out/eating healthy grind tomorrow or I probably will be in the next season of My 600lb Life.

 

 

 

 

...but until tomorrow I have an entire box of Walmart sugar cookies with Valentine's Day themed icing and sprinkles. 

 

tumblr_inline_n0jdqh44ma1qzse5k.gif

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I can’t find jeans that fit my butt and my waist. My butt size requires about 3 sizes larger than my waist size.

I remember calling to order my bridesmaid dress for my brothers wedding, a sassy gay man was working for the bridal shop, I told him my measurments, and he said “Oh jesus honey, you’re going to need some tailoring”. and I did.

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I need to catch up with PLL, I have up awhile back.

I'm too scared to actually watch my 600lb life.

 

OH IT IS TERRIFYING.

 

also, i started watching PLL to fill the chuck bass/blair waldorf shaped hole in my heart when GG ended. it is simultaneously the best and worst thing i have ever seen on television.

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That sucks, Madie! But damn, I wish my butt was a little more noticeable. Need to go walk up stairs more often.

 

Did anyone bring up the whole "girls don't fart/poop" topic yet? How do your partners feel about it? Because I often joke to my dude about it and even he pretends he doesn't poop.

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I can’t find jeans that fit my butt and my waist. My butt size requires about 3 sizes larger than my waist size.

I remember calling to order my bridesmaid dress for my brothers wedding, a sassy gay man was working for the bridal shop, I told him my measurments, and he said “Oh jesus honey, you’re going to need some tailoring”. and I did.

 

i have no butt, average waist for my build, and relatively wide hips. i usually get a huge butt sized gap in the waist in the back of my jeans if they fit my hips. it's fairly irritating.

 

maybe we could work out some sort of partial ass-swappage deal. not weird at all.

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im gonna chime in on periods. i have no shame, it doesnt bother me....i have sisters.

 

i buy my wife's tampons and crampy med when that time comes because she is literally bed ridden for 3 days. she cancels work and cant leave the house. she doesnt move. wind from a butterfly flapping its wings would hurt her boobs beyond anything.

 

anyone else experience this? is there something out there?

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i have no butt, average waist for my build, and relatively wide hips. i usually get a huge butt sized gap in the waist in the back of my jeans if they fit my hips. it's fairly irritating.

 

maybe we could work out some sort of partial ass-swappage deal. not weird at all.

I like having a large butt & boobs but it’s getting out of control. I would gladly spread some butt-age out to you haha

 

That sucks, Madie! But damn, I wish my butt was a little more noticeable. Need to go walk up stairs more often.

 

Did anyone bring up the whole "girls don't fart/poop" topic yet? How do your partners feel about it? Because I often joke to my dude about it and even he pretends he doesn't poop.

 

you have a man. woo woo. :wub:

 

I don't talk about that subject even with my best friends. I hate the word p*op. it makes me shiver.

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im gonna chime in on periods. i have no shame, it doesnt bother me....i have sisters.

 

i buy my wife's tampons and crampy med when that time comes because she is literally bed ridden for 3 days. she cancels work and cant leave the house. she doesnt move. wind from a butterfly flapping its wings would hurt her boobs beyond anything.

 

anyone else experience this? is there something out there?

 

before my magical birth control i was like that. living on ibuprofen. taking around 20 a day probably. and I hated everyone.

 

my mom was the same, she actually had a hysterectomy because fuck it, she wasn't having any more kids.

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I can’t find jeans that fit my butt and my waist. My butt size requires about 3 sizes larger than my waist size.

I remember calling to order my bridesmaid dress for my brothers wedding, a sassy gay man was working for the bridal shop, I told him my measurments, and he said “Oh jesus honey, you’re going to need some tailoring”. and I did.

 

UUUUGHHHH. All my jeans just ripped and I need new pairs but the ONLY pair that fit me properly are Amercian Eagle's skinny jegging. Even those are a little tight in the waist. If it fits in the waist, it's too big for my butt and my legs. If it fits everywhere else perfectly, I turn into an actual muffin. 

 

Of course, AE is out of my size right now so that's real great.

I just went jeans shopping and tried on other pants, nearly had an emotional breakdown because I couldn't find anything that fit. 

 

I'm currently resorting to wearing leggings under my pants until further notice.

 

ha! i just watched that sex and the city episode where carrie farts around big.  and yeah, i'm the woman that pretends i don't do that or burp.  i get so grossed out by that

 

I actually rarely do any of those things, which definitely isn't healthy. 

 

Everyone is always extremely shocked if I burp and even then it sounds more like a tiny hiccup.

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