rtw88 Posted June 5, 2014 Share Posted June 5, 2014 A couple months ago my girlfriend of 8 years and I found out she was unexpectedly 5 months pregnant, so I will be starting on the journey of fatherhood in September. I've never seen one but sorry if a thread exists for this already. I just figured I'd make a catch all thread to talk about parenting stuff. I'm the first of my friends to have a baby so it's tough not having another new/contemporary parent to talk to about stuff. I'd be particularly interested in hearing about invaluable resources or resources I might not know about concerning raising a kid. The old lady and I are pretty excited. Even though we weren't expecting a baby at the moment, we had agreed we would have kids in the future. It's just a little nerve wracking to feel so unprepared all of the time. JoToRoBo, daegor, passionbrand and 1 other 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abovetheearth Posted June 5, 2014 Share Posted June 5, 2014 Pray you can breastfeed. Don't buy shoes until 8 months. Don't buy the fancy shit for crib. Only sheets. They can suffocate on all that extra crap. No need for fancy thermometer. Get humidifier. More to come. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JoToRoBo Posted June 5, 2014 Share Posted June 5, 2014 Just found out 2 weeks ago my number 2 is coming in January. I was a father at 21. It was not as hard as I thought it would be, the internet is a great tool, just not for diagnosing illnesses!! It will terrify you, but advice on what to do is a good thing. It can be expensive, if you are not too prideful, which I was not, we got some state help (foodstamps, and a program called WIC) WIC was cool because regardless of income you got like free milk, baby formula, cereal, eggs, and it helped. If you are financially set then don't even worry about that. If you are not financially set, and if you have not already, get some free state insurance for her while you can. I am sure there will be some people reading this who think it is wrong to get state help, or might even look down for you, but your not leaching if you need it, you pay plenty of taxes and deserve help if you need it. When it comes to actual parenting, nothing is more fun and enjoyable than watching this human life take shape, and be molded by you. To see them like the music you like, love the movies you love, is and endless feeling of enjoyment. Be prepared, if you were like us and had no baby sitter, to miss out on those concerts you once saw. My friends literally fell off the map when we had a kid. I do not know if that was us being busy, and desiring to be alone, or if the friends just had nothing to do with us anymore. Regardless, we were growing up, and they were not. Tax refunds! Boy are they great with children. If you get one every year you look forward to up to $3,500 dollars in tax credits for working and having children. Hope yours is born this year! If not you'll see that next year. Do not worry my friend! Every situation will be enhanced when you little dude or dudette is there to enjoy it with you every step of the way. You ever have any questions friend me here, and message me if ya want! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JoToRoBo Posted June 5, 2014 Share Posted June 5, 2014 Get humidifier. More to come. truth! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zick Posted June 5, 2014 Share Posted June 5, 2014 Expecting our first in 3 weeks so this is very relevant to my interests. We've read so much about parenting and babies and pregnancy, but we still feel so lost and unprepared Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jerseydave77 Posted June 5, 2014 Share Posted June 5, 2014 Congrats man. Nothing said here can fully prepare you for the lifestyle shift that is about to take place. Being five months already plan a shower, kids are expensive so feel no shame in leaning on friends and family initially. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
daegor Posted June 5, 2014 Share Posted June 5, 2014 Whatever you think you should do, whatever other people think you should do, it's all overkill. My little man is coming up on two this summer. All he's ever needed is my attention and focus. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BuzzersonKillwell Posted June 5, 2014 Share Posted June 5, 2014 My daughter is 11 days old so I'm pretty fresh into this thing. So far I'd say a couple things. Take the first week or two off if possible. You will be tired and emotionally exhausted. Give yourself time to recover. If your going to do a cloth diaper system don't bother for the first couple months. The nurses at the hospital are very helpful, ask lots of questions. Once you leave have a lactation consultant come to your home, or at least find one you could call. We've had breastfeeding issues and she has been so, so important. I can't stress this enough. Be flexible! Your birth plan and how you envision the first few weeks is probably going out the window. Go ahead and make one but don't let it bother you when you have to adapt. You'll stop being worried about breaking the newborn after a day or two and you'll stop checking to make sure they are still breathing after the first week. That's what I've got for now. Happy to answer any specific questions! daegor 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BuzzersonKillwell Posted June 5, 2014 Share Posted June 5, 2014 Oh, and congratulations my man! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abovetheearth Posted June 5, 2014 Share Posted June 5, 2014 SLEEP WHEN THE BABY SLEEPS. daegor 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JoToRoBo Posted June 5, 2014 Share Posted June 5, 2014 You'll stop being worried about breaking the newborn after a day or two and you'll stop checking to make sure they are still breathing after the first week. My daughter is four and my wife still checks, might just be insanity Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Satan Posted June 5, 2014 Share Posted June 5, 2014 Im not a dad, but I felt like one for about a year and a half until the lady at the time split. It's a great feeling! Congrats and good luck! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
daegor Posted June 5, 2014 Share Posted June 5, 2014 Obligatory picture: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BuzzersonKillwell Posted June 5, 2014 Share Posted June 5, 2014 Did you guys baby sleep real well at first and then stop. Ophelia sleeps like 3-4 hours at a time so I only have to wake 1 in the night. Wondering when that is going to end. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yocaseycasey Posted June 5, 2014 Share Posted June 5, 2014 My daughter is 11 days old so I'm pretty fresh into this thing. So far I'd say a couple things. Take the first week or two off if possible. You will be tired and emotionally exhausted. Give yourself time to recover. If your going to do a cloth diaper system don't bother for the first couple months. The nurses at the hospital are very helpful, ask lots of questions. Once you leave have a lactation consultant come to your home, or at least find one you could call. We've had breastfeeding issues and she has been so, so important. I can't stress this enough. Be flexible! Your birth plan and how you envision the first few weeks is probably going out the window. Go ahead and make one but don't let it bother you when you have to adapt. You'll stop being worried about breaking the newborn after a day or two and you'll stop checking to make sure they are still breathing after the first week. That's what I've got for now. Happy to answer any specific questions! DUDE! I HAD NO CLUE!!! Lanegan lullabies coming your way soon, my friend! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
daegor Posted June 5, 2014 Share Posted June 5, 2014 Did you guys baby sleep real well at first and then stop. Ophelia sleeps like 3-4 hours at a time so I only have to wake 1 in the night. Wondering when that is going to end. For the first couple of weeks it was 2-3 hours at once, then around 4 hours until 6 weeks, after the amount of time he slept without waking got progressively longer... For the last year he's sleep 12 hours solid except when he's teething, but each teething session only lasts 2-3 days during which he's slightly grumpy and doesn't sleep well. We have the easiest kid ever. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abovetheearth Posted June 5, 2014 Share Posted June 5, 2014 Ever since six weeks Charlotte has slept 10 to 12 hours a day/night we've been pretty lucky daegor and captainaldous 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jerseydave77 Posted June 5, 2014 Share Posted June 5, 2014 My kid didn't sleep through the night for two years. It was torture. He's four now and gets in our bed every night between 3 and 6 am - its bliss. I love when he nudges me and says " daddy will you snuggle me?" Parenthood is a huge shift but I love being a Dad. Experiencing life for the first time alongside your kid is the most beautiful thing I can imagine. They really do want your time and affection more than anything so be hands on from day one. Congrats Ryan. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
daegor Posted June 5, 2014 Share Posted June 5, 2014 Parenthood is a huge shift but I love being a Dad. Experiencing life for the first time alongside your kid is the most beautiful thing I can imagine. They really do want your time and affection more than anything so be hands on from day one. Congrats Ryan. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yocaseycasey Posted June 5, 2014 Share Posted June 5, 2014 - Showers are key. Have two or three for different groups of friends. We are at 8 months now, and have probably only bought 4 cases of diapers to date. Showers had our nursery walls stacked to the ceiling with diapers. Also, ask for size 2s at the shower. Everyone will think to buy size 1, and then you'll have a ton of leftovers.- I second the lactation consultant. We had a place in Bloomington called BABS that was awesome. Went in for a 2 hour sit down that cost us a whopping $15, and a lady watched Sparrow nurse and gave pointers. Have the mama get involved with a local nursing circle or something of that sort for support. It helps a ton with the mom's confidence, the baby's confidence, and it makes things WAY less stressful for you at home (ie your wife won't be depressed or crazy due to concerns with nursing). Being a dad is easy if you care. My buddy said it best when he said "There are lots of dudes with kids, but not all of them are dads." The lack of sleep is totally worth the end result. daegor 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Out of Breath Records Posted June 6, 2014 Share Posted June 6, 2014 Wait how do you not know until 5 months? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tarzioo_ Posted June 6, 2014 Share Posted June 6, 2014 I don't have kids but I frequently babysit my sisters kids. Get them on a schedule and commit to that schedule. Maybe not with a newborn as much as with a toddler, but when it's nap time, make them sleep or they will fall asleep at 6pm and be wide awake at 2am. The 3 yr old hates naps, but it is everyday at 3pm until 5pm and when it's actual bedtime, she sleeps through the night. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abovetheearth Posted June 6, 2014 Share Posted June 6, 2014 ^ agreed. Bedtime routine is HUGE Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
distinctlydustin Posted June 6, 2014 Share Posted June 6, 2014 Glad this thread exists! But first, congratulations! My daughter turned four months old yesterday. We are feeding her right now, so I'll dish out more here in a minute. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chefchino Posted June 6, 2014 Share Posted June 6, 2014 SLEEP WHEN THE BABY SLEEPS. daegor 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.