zacaroo21 Posted March 14, 2013 Share Posted March 14, 2013 By the way you're speaking, it seems like careers are much more important to both of you than each other. I could be reading that wrong, but I say you just straight up tell her and see what she says - if she's heartbroken and really thinks there is something there, she'll find a way to make it work. If she just kind of shrugs it off, that was that but still stay in contact because life likes to toss people crazy curveballs and you never know what could happen. All in all, don't fret too much about it. Do your thing, man! noodle 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zacaroo21 Posted March 14, 2013 Share Posted March 14, 2013 Really, in all that, I just mean that if you're happier working a better job - do that. But if you're happier with this person with a lesser job - do that. Simple in theory. Will probably wreck your shit if you strew over it. noodle 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 14, 2013 Share Posted March 14, 2013 you seem to think she might be worth sticking around for. talk to her tomorrow. straight up. ask if she feels the same. you are both old enough and familiar enough with each other that you shouldn't have to beat around the bush at all.. especially at this crucial of a moment. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
noodle Posted March 14, 2013 Share Posted March 14, 2013 definitely not wrecking my shit... i've thought about it. i realize that the move is happening. i have been pushing this move for quite some time and finally my time is here. this is going to sound shitty as there is no tone in posts, but my career is coming first. i understand jobs come and go, but this is a good one. i say this as genuine as possible - not like a prick.. I AM SELFISH. I AM FIRST. my question is more of the long distance thing. does it work? with not a ton to base it of off - 2 months of sleeping together?! j/k... but a nice history and a genuine care for each other. we each don't have time to meet tons of new people and do all that. i've been single for 3 years or so - having fun in the meantime - but did not want to lock it down as i was busy with work and finished the master's degree.. and knew geographic change might be on the horizon. I could live without her (sounds bad) as an item/girlfriend but having her as such would be nice. i feel she would feel the same. she's been really cool with what i'm doing and extremely supportive. my future would be career oriented and more than likely going for my doctorate at UF. one would think... jeez dude, just answer these questions yourself - you can figure it out... but i've thought about it. i don't want to commit and get my heart torn and vice versa. need to respect her as well. i can ask her - i know this. but... i know these long distance things work - but so many risks, yet huge rewards. bad thing is - her work would never put her in FL. p.s. future record sale because i'll be condensing from a 3 bedroom house to a 2 bedroom townhome/apt. get your attention now? haha. that will come later though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 14, 2013 Share Posted March 14, 2013 i've said it a number of times in here- i've gone the long-distance route, and it only lasted 6 months, despite each of us strongly believing it was the real thing. distance is just a brutal sumbitch, and it takes some serious willpower and determination. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
noodle Posted March 14, 2013 Share Posted March 14, 2013 sumbitch! for me... it'd have to me being content with seeing her once a month for a while if i was lucky. the trust would be there. but there is just more to it, i feel. but what that more is, i don't know. never been in that boat. my last long distance relationship was 95 miles - and that was after i graduated and she was still at school. that did work out well, but the distance was nothing. advice will be taken from any - male and female (hence the title of thread).. if anybody wants to contribute, i am definitely listening/reading. something tells me madie can chime in! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 14, 2013 Share Posted March 14, 2013 i dont think we ever had any trust issues. i didnt, at least. but its very, very difficult when you can only rely on skype and text. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thebiglebowski Posted March 14, 2013 Share Posted March 14, 2013 Dude your post says everything. If she was the one you would be thinking "where can I get my doctorate so that I can still be close to her" not "I'm doing my thing, and she can come along if she wants". Doctorate is probably a 4 year commitment. Long distance might work in some cases, but I don't know about 4 years. I'd say break it off and start fresh in Florida. Side note -- what field? I defend next month. Industrial Engineering. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
suchashorttime Posted March 14, 2013 Share Posted March 14, 2013 i've never had a long distance thing work. i've tried a couple times. it's hard being away from someone and having no physical outlet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rudeboydh Posted March 14, 2013 Share Posted March 14, 2013 The long distance thing worked for me, but then about a 9 months into it, I moved out here to be with her. I think you should go for it, then play it by ear and see what happens. If it's too much for you to handle, break it off, but it may be great and you'll never know if you don't try. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 14, 2013 Share Posted March 14, 2013 something tells me madie can chime in! well noodle, I guess it all comes down to how you feel about this girl. Is there passion? Does she make you crazy, in a good way? Seems like you have a lot in common, similar in age, both focused on career. But can you see your life without her? Everyone can sit here and say distance worked for them, distance didn’t work for them. (personally my ex and I only made it a little over a month when he moved to Georgia) but it’s what works for you. just from reading the few things you’ve written I can’t tell what you feel for her. I know it’s still early, but you’re a smart guy. You either see yourself moving forward with her, or moving and starting something completely new with someone else. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ronniegwilliams Posted March 15, 2013 Share Posted March 15, 2013 Update: I've hung out with girl a few times now and each time I've played it super cool, nothing physical minus a shoulder/knee touch. I'm always a gentleman (opening doors, buying drinks, etc, etc) but I have the crudest sense of humor in the universe, so I was trying to keep that on the down low just so I could feel out what kind of humor she has. I've made a couple of jokes about "waiting til marriage" and I guess I didn't consider that she might think I was serious, apparently she did. We joked about it and she jokingly accused me of being PG (due to the filter I used to not make her uncomfortable), and she thought she was going to ruin me. Now we're both struggling to not mount each other cuz this could actually go somewhere. This post is kinda random, but they're all talking about rough sex in the "Confessions" thread, and I'm kinda dying over here. Seriously, girl went to New Orleans last night, and on the drive she was telling me about how much I turn her on. Tom Petty is right, the waiting is the hardest part. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oohdoiloveyou Posted March 15, 2013 Share Posted March 15, 2013 Sexting - the only reason I didn't go completely insane while in a long distance relationship. Go get it ronnie. BuzzersonKillwell 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sjb2k1 Posted March 15, 2013 Share Posted March 15, 2013 my gf and i live on opposite sides of the country. skype is a god send. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chamb117 Posted March 15, 2013 Share Posted March 15, 2013 Update: I've hung out with girl a few times now and each time I've played it super cool, nothing physical minus a shoulder/knee touch. I'm always a gentleman (opening doors, buying drinks, etc, etc) but I have the crudest sense of humor in the universe, so I was trying to keep that on the down low just so I could feel out what kind of humor she has. I've made a couple of jokes about "waiting til marriage" and I guess I didn't consider that she might think I was serious, apparently she did. We joked about it and she jokingly accused me of being PG (due to the filter I used to not make her uncomfortable), and she thought she was going to ruin me. Now we're both struggling to not mount each other cuz this could actually go somewhere. This post is kinda random, but they're all talking about rough sex in the "Confessions" thread, and I'm kinda dying over here. Seriously, girl went to New Orleans last night, and on the drive she was telling me about how much I turn her on. Tom Petty is right, the waiting is the hardest part. unleash the beast! the longer you guys suppress this shit, the bigger of an explosion into sexual fury it'll become. ...which, perhaps, may be a good thing... but seriously, i don't get why you're waiting. you mentioned you were joking about it? maybe i'm missing the point. also, if she likes you enough as is and thinks you're being PG, let loose that sense of humor as well. especially if that's who you are, man. be yourself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bigbruise Posted March 15, 2013 Share Posted March 15, 2013 I was seeing this chic before I left for basic. We hung out a few times, first night we were making out and I was feeling some tatas and she passed out on me, we were drunk. So I'm like shit man. Next time it's on right? Well the next time she tells me "no funny business" before I head over there. I'm confused as hell and thinking I just just got friend zoned. Anyways I'm on the bus to basic training and she asked me why I never made a move, I say "because you told me not to" (I'm a gentleman as well, ronnie). She tells me just for that night, and proceeds to send me some nudes. I'm on the bus to fucking basic training and this bitch is sending me nudes. Aka what in the flying 747 fuck? The next few months of my life sucked. Edit: in response to Ronnie... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 15, 2013 Share Posted March 15, 2013 Aka what in the flying 747 fuck? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BuzzersonKillwell Posted March 15, 2013 Share Posted March 15, 2013 Sexting - the only reason I didn't go completely insane while in a long distance relationship. Go get it ronnie. I saw your signature first and liked it because I thought it was the post. But then I kept it because Ronnie SHOULD go get it. Why the waiting? Has anyone ever found a correlation between duration before sex and length of relationship? I know I haven't. Duration OF sex, well, that is a different story. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 15, 2013 Share Posted March 15, 2013 Sexting - the only reason I didn't go completely insane while in a long distance relationship. Go get it ronnie. my LDR didn't even include that. she was too self-conscious. sent me one booty pic for my birthday. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ronniegwilliams Posted March 15, 2013 Share Posted March 15, 2013 I've been myself, I just haven't been making as many crude jokes. As for the waiting thing, this is a decision we've both made. I never wait, ad it always leads to things not lasting, and this chick is pretty phenomenal so I would really like to see where this goes. Besides, it would be pretty rad to wait until we both are insanely comfortable with each other. oohdoiloveyou 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rudeboydh Posted March 15, 2013 Share Posted March 15, 2013 This belongs here, right? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oohdoiloveyou Posted March 15, 2013 Share Posted March 15, 2013 my LDR didn't even include that. she was too self-conscious. sent me one booty pic for my birthday. How did you even make it?! But sexting doesn't always have to include pics. Maybe I'm just a huge hornball. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thehippysteve Posted March 15, 2013 Share Posted March 15, 2013 I was seeing this chic before I left for basic. We hung out a few times, first night we were making out and I was feeling some tatas and she passed out on me, we were drunk. So I'm like shit man. Next time it's on right? Well the next time she tells me "no funny business" before I head over there. I'm confused as hell and thinking I just just got friend zoned. Anyways I'm on the bus to basic training and she asked me why I never made a move, I say "because you told me not to" (I'm a gentleman as well, ronnie). She tells me just for that night, and proceeds to send me some nudes. I'm on the bus to fucking basic training and this bitch is sending me nudes. Aka what in the flying 747 fuck? The next few months of my life sucked. Edit: in response to Ronnie... Sounds a lot like when I moved back from Texas, hottest girl ever. Super flirty and really pushed the envelope on the phone or texting but, always kinda stopped my advances. Even when I said I was moving back. Then like a few days after leaving she texts "How come we didn't have sex?". That conversation went pretty much like that Louis C.K. joke Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 15, 2013 Share Posted March 15, 2013 so much good stuff in here right now. here is my contribution: hes baaaaackkk. I haven’t heard from him in a pretty long time and here he comes with this. it’s been almost 4 years and 3 phone number changes and he still finds me. I block his number, he gets a new one. this might seem like a personal text but this is the same dude who likes to tell me different ways he wants me to die... miserably. I don’t respond, but he keeps going.in other news the guy I left the above guy for, tried to get me to do coke with him last weekend. so there is that. Now I know why he’s been losing weight lately.also, I may be the only girl who’s never sent nudes. I’m way too paranoid that shit will get into the wrong hands. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ronniegwilliams Posted March 15, 2013 Share Posted March 15, 2013 I have a shit ton of nudes from a lot of girls, these were definitely not girlfriend material gals, probably about time they all got deleted Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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