scottheisel Posted August 8, 2012 Share Posted August 8, 2012 I'm a shade under two months from my wedding (to the greatest woman in the world, I'd crawl through broken glass to be with her, yadda yadda yadda) and I'm starting to panic at the sheer cost of everything. I thought for sure we could do a wedding for under $10k, but our catering and rental costs ALONE are, like, $12k. Part of the reason for that is 1)we're expecting between 175-200 people and 2)the space we're having the wedding in (an art gallery in downtown Cleveland) has no tables/chairs/etc. so we have to rent EVERYTHING. I'm also panicking a little bit because my fiancee's mom and grandma are sewing her dress for her, and I am TERRIFIED that she won't like it, or they won't finish it in time, or it'll just look lumpy or something. The weird thing is, she doesn't seem to be worried that much about this, just me. Compounding issues is her family's inability to pay for much (if any) of the wedding costs. Meaning this is falling squarely on our shoulders. Not stoked on that whatsoever. On the plus side, the wedding band is booked, rings have been picked out, the officiant is (almost) confirmed and the airfare and lodging for the honeymoon have been purchased/reserved, respectively. So I feel like even if everything else falls apart or not live up to our expectations, at least we will be able to get legally married and go to Mexico for a week. STRESS STRESS STRESS Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
keithcallas Posted August 8, 2012 Share Posted August 8, 2012 When I got married we stressed very little, we both acknolwledged the fact that things are going to go wrong no matter how well planned things are. Just enjoy it......... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hipsterasfolk Posted August 8, 2012 Share Posted August 8, 2012 Should have talked to me, I could have cut you a deal at the Country Club and a catering company Money$ bagzzz! lol If I ever get married I'm eloping Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted August 8, 2012 Share Posted August 8, 2012 Going through the same thing, Scott; my wedding is in November. Fortunately, my fiancee has a lot of it under control; unfortunately, it is still too expensive. Gotta stop buying records right now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GradedOnACurve Posted August 8, 2012 Share Posted August 8, 2012 Hope for the best but expect a few hiccups. My wedding was 5-7k total but you gotta stress a small wedding i had less than 100 people and we cut big corners with decorations and had friends and family do photos cake (no dj) etc. remember its about the marriage and not the wedding day itself! Good luck Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ronniegwilliams Posted August 8, 2012 Share Posted August 8, 2012 Oh man, I remember all of that business. Though I can't recall exactly how expensive my wedding was, I know that I'm probably still paying for it via credit cards. I wanted to do the Las Vegas wedding super badly, but she was all 'team catholic' about it. Next time I get married it better be by a skinny Elvis goddammit. The best thing to do is make lists, that way you have something to keep you on track so you don't become overwhelmed thinking about ten different things at once. Don't be shy about calling around places to compare prices, or even trying to negotiate for your business. Congrats on your big day. Just remember when you're stressed to take a second to look at that pretty girl that's gonna let you spend the rest of your life with her, that'll at least chill you out for a second or two. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
littlebistro Posted August 8, 2012 Share Posted August 8, 2012 I definitely saved money by cutting about 30 people from the list. People were upset they weren't invited, but I'm not made of money! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
flood Posted August 8, 2012 Share Posted August 8, 2012 damn scotty should have called me... i think we paid 7-8k and that included the honeymoon.. and we had about 200 people, and it was in a really nice place.... and we had a huge "pre-wedding wedding" for all of our friends at a local club with our friends bands, managed to have it free if you were over 21.. and the club gave us 2 bucks a head... so we managed to knock $1200 off what we had to personally spend on the church ceremony. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mick Posted August 8, 2012 Share Posted August 8, 2012 before I got hitched, the gal and I started making a list of folks who we'd invite. we got up to 150 people and immediately said "fuck it." we went to the courthouse, then got breakfast. a nice dinner followed that evening. it total, $25 was spent on the license, $15 on breakfast, and dinner ended up being free cuz we knew the chef. the divorce on the other hand, cost $250. thank goodness we had neither: money, debt, kids, stuff. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hipsterasfolk Posted August 8, 2012 Share Posted August 8, 2012 Speaking of wedding talk does any one have recommandations for Pre-Nup planning? (This is not insulting anyone in the thread, I really need to draft one lol) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
littlebistro Posted August 8, 2012 Share Posted August 8, 2012 Speaking of wedding talk does any one have recommandations for Pre-Nup planning? (This is not insulting anyone in the thread, I really need to draft one lol) Don't. If you are getting married, you shouldn't be planning a divorce. selfreliable 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hipsterasfolk Posted August 8, 2012 Share Posted August 8, 2012 Don't. If you are getting married, you shouldn't be planning a divorce. I don't plan on a divorce but I also don't feel like forfeiting half of my families estates, stables, stock portfolios, and horses. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
littlebistro Posted August 8, 2012 Share Posted August 8, 2012 I don't plan on a divorce but I also don't feel like forfeiting half of my families estates, stables, stock portfolios, and horses. Fair enough. If I had money to begin with, I may have considered it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
flood Posted August 8, 2012 Share Posted August 8, 2012 then you just have your family set up the inhertance as a trust.. or some other regulated thing where it can't go to someone outside the family... its less insulting than a pre-nup but the same purpose... pre-nups generally only protect assets that were obtained prior to the marriage... so anything afterwards is a marital asset. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
selfreliable Posted August 8, 2012 Share Posted August 8, 2012 I don't plan on a divorce but I also don't feel like forfeiting half of my families estates, stables, stock portfolios, and horses. Then hold off on the wedding dude. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hipsterasfolk Posted August 8, 2012 Share Posted August 8, 2012 then you just have your family set up the inhertance as a trust.. or some other regulated thing where it can't go to someone outside the family... its less insulting than a pre-nup but the same purpose... pre-nups generally only protect assets that were obtained prior to the marriage... so anything afterwards is a marital asset. Sounds good, back to Scott's topic though. I don't want to derail his thread Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted August 8, 2012 Share Posted August 8, 2012 just throwing this out there, as a woman I totally wouldn't be offended by a pre-nup. you never know what will end up happening. echoing everyone elses statements about cutting the guest list down, that’s what my brother has been doing. (getting married sept 1st) he was also fortunate enough to be close friends with the gm of the place they’re getting married, he gave them a huge discount. so I guess what I’m saying is... hire your friends? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BuzzersonKillwell Posted August 8, 2012 Share Posted August 8, 2012 People who don't think pre-nups are ever warranted are romantics not realists. But since that isn't the topic at hand, and clearly doesn't apply to Scott, here is all I can offer. The wife and I went through our list of weddings things we thought people would find important and remember. For us it was music, food and booze. Anything OUTSIDE of that we went a cheap or easiest option. I've never left a wedding thinking about how the centerpieces ruined it. Prioritize the things that matter, stop stressing about anything and everything else. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yocaseycasey Posted August 8, 2012 Share Posted August 8, 2012 What the hell, hipster. You're rich? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hipsterasfolk Posted August 8, 2012 Share Posted August 8, 2012 just throwing this out there, as a woman I totally wouldn't be offended by a pre-nup. you never know what will end up happening. echoing everyone elses statements about cutting the guest list down, that’s what my brother has been doing. (getting married sept 1st) he was also fortunate enough to be close friends with the gm of the place they’re getting married, he gave them a huge discount. so I guess what I’m saying is... hire your friends? Yea that's what my parents did! We just had the after party in our party center room. All the food/liquor/etc. was already ours and the coworkers were guests lol So friends w/ spaces def. do shave off several $Xk for sure, it honestly depends on what kind of wedding it is and etc. though too. But renting tables and etc. will not be cheap and just hope you don't have to clean up after ahaha its the worst! What the hell, hipster. You're rich? Nope, I just pretend I have nice things on the internet...I don't even collect records Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ajax Posted August 8, 2012 Share Posted August 8, 2012 my husband and i had an extremely small and cheap wedding, so i can't offer too much advice. although, if your fiancee or anyone you know is crafty, you can cut down the costs for several things, like centerpieces, flowers, all that jazz. for example, i know someone that made her bouquet out of sheet music for the song that her and her husband walked down the isle to. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
smailtronic Posted August 8, 2012 Share Posted August 8, 2012 Let her worry about the dress. It's hers, and her family is doing it for her. If she's happy, let it go. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stickler Posted August 9, 2012 Share Posted August 9, 2012 Cant believe how cheap weddings over int he US are. Over here me and my fiance were looking for a place for only around 60-70 guests and was going to cost £15-18k. That was for everything though and guestimates for honeymoon and such. As that would take us too long to save, we decided on an abroad wedding in Italy, wedding itself cost £1k, clothes and trave and hotel we saying £2k and then food in a resturant for 40 peopel is £3k a massive saving. so we going with that anything else is extra. But seems over in the Uk (I assume the same in the US) you throw wedding in front of it and price doubles, a pub near mine would give a hire for £600 for a party, mention wedding party it goes to £1800. Much easier to elope or have a small thing unless you have family helping or lots of saving or dont mind being in debt for a few years :S Hope all goes well though Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
afireinside7444 Posted August 10, 2012 Share Posted August 10, 2012 I'm no help. We got married in ohio. Used the cash for a week long all inclusive in the dominican republic. And her dad footed the 5k for a hall/reception when we got back. And we found a stupid cheap per plate and booze at a hall that had just put close to a million into renovations so was no dump. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
afireinside7444 Posted August 10, 2012 Share Posted August 10, 2012 Oh ad plan on at least 1 divorce. I'm on number 2 sjb2k1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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