Addiction (srs)

[almightyseancore]

wellllllll

it's 11:42 and i haven't smoked pot or had a beer yet, and i'm noticing some changes in how i feel/how things effect me.

i'm really low on smoke (which doesn't happen often) so i'm rationing it, and i'm noticing that i get irritable without it.

and the beer thing, i like to wait til noon, but usually i don't.

i'm almost always buzzed on something, and i truely believe that it makes my life more enjoyable to live this way, but when i go without it is when i become concerned, because i begin to notice cravings, and my anxiety goes through the roof.

this same thing happened when i quit cigarettes almost 2 years ago, and i hated it!

i've always convinced myself pot wasn't addictive but i've never been sober long enough to notice any cravings or change in personality.

and i've never craved beer until recently.

i've never been TOO much of a drinker. (once or twice a week, maybe) but in the past month or so it's gone to every day, not to mention my tolerance has increased dramatically.

so yeah, lets talk about the down side to enjoying life.

and sober people, try not to insult anyone.

[One Hundred Fifty-Two]

Do you work?

[xjustinxschwierx]

any sober person that would attack or insult you in this thread for opening up and seeking advice deserves an open handed slap in the face.

That being said, I hope you find the help you need to overcome this, but I have no experience in this to offer.

[almightyseancore]

Do you work?

not currently.

my wife is the breadwinner.

and my beer consumption, tho frequent, is still small in comparison to a lot of the people in my life.

i usually keep it under a six pack a day.

[j4m35]

my advice is to set goals for yourself -- something simple like not smoking until it is dark out. i recently quit smoking weed, as i was literally high all day. that with my depression just made me basically a shut-in. you should also remember that being high should be an event, not your default state. realizations like that really helped in my stopping. direct your anxiety towards something productive or creative. it doesn't really matter what, but it is something pass the time.

i'm trying to quit smoking cigarettes right now. a pack a day at 22 is not good. my goal right now is to get to just one a night before bed. nicotine gum has been sort of helping, but just keeping myself busy is way more effective.

[flood]

try to envelope yourself in something that requires you not be messed up.. ie some sort of job/hobby/passion that requires your head to be clear, and is going to consume a ton of time.. sure it might be trading one addiction for another, but it could be a much healthier pursuit. i used to party a lot more in college/right after college.. but then i decided to push my label and show promoting up a lot... and all of a sudden i couldn't afford to be drinking at the bars i was working at because i had to keep things moving smoothly, or i had to have my wits about me dealing with crap on the computer at home... and that pretty much kept me from becoming a big mess.

[almightyseancore]

all good ideas. and will be considered.

i agree, being high should be an experience and not just a default, but life seems so dull when sober in comparison, but i think that kinda defines the addictions in itself.

i'm just glad i was smart enough to never get deep in the heavy stuff.

i experimented with pretty much everything back in the 90s but stuck with pot.

and i have literally been stoned constantly since somewhere between 99 and 01 (maybe 4 or 5 days of sobriety between 01 and now)

[GradedOnACurve]

I'd check to see if your city/county offers services in terms of substance abuse counseling...that is unless you and your wife have benefits to see a private counselor. Seeking one would be beneficial because most people end up gauging their own behavior by talking you way through with a counselor.

[almightyseancore]

if i felt i needed counseling i'd be a part of it already.

this isn't that bad, this is more me complaining about cravings, and how i'm aware of whats happening to me.

i know it's time to slow down, i don't need a doctor to tell me that.

the trick is actually doing it.

this was actually supposed to be less about me and more about community discussion on the topic of addiction and seeing how people here deal with theirs.

and yes, record collecting can count as an addiction.

[motorbike]

i have been in your boat for sure. i go through "eras" where i will smoke a bunch for a year or two and then quit for a year. this last stint has been about four years and boy did i have a wild ride! fun for sure but you get to a point, or at least i do, where you feel like you are becoming paranoid and dumb downed(spelling?). so it was break time. i did, however give a go with some friends before an art show last wednesday and i was in the madness as i call it. that was nice. you lose that after you build up a tolerance.

i quit about five or six months ago. and slowly started smoking legal bud. that shit is nuts by the way and probably way more terrible for you than weed. its kept me smoking maybe 2-3 times a week which is way better than multiple times a day. i mostly smoke alone when i am playing video games, surfing the web and listening to music or editing pictures. i just enjoy being stoned alone in this "era".

i drink maybe two to three times a week and thats a crazy weekend. keep in mind i like to drink to get drunk. and i mean draunk. i dont give a damn for the taste. i have never had anyone complain about me being an asshole or anything like that. i feel like people enjoy my company on those nights but who knows. no DUIs or arrests or any of that jazz. i have been known to get pink eye at the claremont lounge once or twice or stand up on a table or two at respectable establishment but thats neither here nor there.

i also dable in other substances that others tend to get strung out on. this weekend i did mollt two nights in a row at dragon*con. fuckin a man, i dont know how you straight edge kids do it, hahah. to each their own though. i dont think i have ever lost my mind as hard as i did the first night. the second was still intense but not like that night. very nice come down as well.

i guess what im slowy getting at here is, like JM345 said, use these times more as events instead of defaults. when i default to smoking weed all the time i get fat and lazy. when its more of an event here or there things tend be a lot more fun and you have company while your at it.

i dont know if your old lady gets down like you do. mine does. my ex didnt. she hated all the times i was stoned/drunk/mindless because she was sober and didnt understand that somewhere in my brain those mushrooms were making me understand the meaning of life(complete sarcasm by the way before i get railed). she may not say anything, but she may very well hate the idea of you being stoned or drunk all the time. use that as inspiration to go outside and ride a bike or skateboard or play guitar or i could go and on and on.

ill end my story now. sorry for rambling. like i said im still recovering from a weekend of complete crazy, followed by a 17 hour work shift and then six hours sleep and then work at 8am till this moment. im about to go get spiced out and laugh at tyler perry.

p.s. i think its awesome that legal bud is refered to as spice because it only makes my inner star wars nerdom that much happier.

[nicole]

i usually keep it under a six pack a day.

move to canada. a 6 pack of beer will run you $12. thats a lot when you aren't working. beer is as cheap as soda in the states. molson canadian is cheaper there than here! and i've never touched the stuff, but I believe a gram of pot is like $10. expensive shit. though i haven't a clue what weed costs in the US or if its any different.

[jblahmaster]

I hope you can overcome this, man. Like flood said trying out different things helps a lot. from what i remember weren't you trying to start a band or something? (Not entirely sure, just vaguely remember you posting about something like that) If so i would say try and delve deeper into that. It certainly helped when i was hooked on coke for a good while.

[rtw88]

I am in no way intending to give concrete advice here, just sharing with you my own anecdote. You may have a serious addiction, I cannot confirm that.

Anyways, until very recently, I was unemployed for nearly 6 months, and it was the longest time I've not been busy with work or school since ever. About 4 months in, I started drinking pretty heavily. I don't smoke, by the way. I would say I was probably getting drunk at 2-3 days a week and drinking something like 5-7 nights a week. I guess that's not super extreme compared to some people, but it was a big change for me, seeing as for the couple years before that I might have gotten drunk on a weekly/biweekly basis. There were really no nights during my 'heavy drinking' period when I didn't want a beer or some wine. Pretty much any night I didn't drink I either had nothing to drink, or had a long internal dialogue with myself as to whether or not I should drink.

Now, however, since I started working again, I don't constantly want to drink. So I'm pretty sure it was mostly out of boredom. I've certainly had a few beers, but I'm not constantly asking myself if I should have a drink or if it's early enough or anything like that. I guess what I'm saying is I still like to drink, but I don't feel the craving I felt when I was bored all the time, an maybe it's the same case for you. So find something outside of the house to keep you busy.

[almightyseancore]

You may have a serious addiction

it's not serious, not yet at least. just starting to become self aware and figured i'd talk about it.

after all, it is just pot and beer.

and yeah, i think most of this probably IS out of boredom, but the fact that i crave it when i'm sober really bothers me.

yet it makes sense, because sobriety really is a rare occurrence for me.

i just think it's funny that i've been high for so long i never realized i could experience a craving. i mean, it's just pot, so thats silly.

craving beer worries me, tho. because lots of my family and both my parents were serious alcoholics. it concerns me because i don't really think i drink THAT much, i NEVER get wasted anymore, and it's rare that i even reach a level i'd consider "drunk". i just catch a buzz and chill and spin records, laugh at tv/internet.

i've noticed things like stress make me crave a beer, cos i know that tingle will calm me down. it's starting to become an excuse kinda like cigarettes were, and i think it's mostly because i'm stuck in this house a lot of the time while my lady works. (we have one car)

and to whomever above asked about the music, yeah i still have a band going, though we're in between drummers which is a horrible situation.

our old drummer from back in 08 has agreed to jam with us again, so we need to set up time to see her and find a new space to rehearse.

pot and beer have always helped my song writing as well, so cutting back would really hinder my traditional way of writing.

and beer REAALLLYY helps me feel comfortable on stage.

i'm considering taking a break on the pot, or at least cut it down to once a day, at night even and cutting the drinking down to about once a week just to experiment with sobriety for a change.

[j4m35]

i always thought a drink or two a night was normal for anyone who drinks, just to relax a bit. my family has done it ever since i can remember. instead of smoking pot before bed try some sleepytime tea with a shot of whiskey in it. works like a charm.

[aviolentworld]

6 beers a day is alot. i know you just started this habit but that would be 42 beers a week and i think they consider 2 beers a day max to be alright.

i used to drink a 12 pack a day when i was 22. i never had alcohol until i was 20 because i grew up with an alcoholic mother and swore to myself i wouldnt touch the stuff. did it anyways. i have a really addictive personality and would always use something else when stopping another. never big into drugs. probably smoked pot 10 times total. but when i stopped smoking i started chewing and vice versa.

since having my twin girls i only drink about 6 beers a week and only chew. i plan on stopping that when my wife takes her boards because when i quit i am a complete asshole to her and she needs to study.

i think if you try quitting something pick one thing and stick with it. don't try to go cold turkey on everything. you will flip the fuck out and resort to taking whatever you tried stopping.

hope things work out for you in the end

[icecream]

AFROMA N WAS GONNA COMPE PLAY MY TOWN AND MY FREIND GOT HIGGGGGGGGGHHHH BUT FORGOT TO TO SEE HIM HAHAHAH

[mcm1610]

I had a friend who would shake until we got alcohol. Then she went to rehab, and holy fuck is alcohol withdrawal brutal. Like... it can seriously kill you if you're not careful.

She just passed 1000 days sober a week or two ago, and that was after a relapse. She's been at it for close to 4 years or so. It's tough, it's always a struggle. Everything in baby steps, though. "I won't drink today."

[podface]

unless i'm reading this wrong, it seems like the only thing bothering you about your weed and alcohol consumption is the cravings you get when your sober. you've been at it for a decade (at least with pot) and from what i can tell, it hasn't strained any major relationships or affected your career (although this may be something your not telling us.) you said yourself that you don't think its a serious addiction and your just worried that it might catch up to you.

from personal experience alone, i'll say that it's a fucking BITCH to quit if you don't really want to. i mean, there were many times in my youth where i saw myself drowning and i thought i HAD to quit, but i just loved getting high. i would flush drugs down the toilet as a sign to myself that "this is it!".. and then go out the next day and buy more, feeling like a fucking idiot. then (and i know this is completely uncommon and totally personal) i woke up one day and just.. didnt feel like getting high. i had a new girlfriend.. the kids i was hanging out with started to seem like dicks to me.. and it just wasn't appealing to me anymore. i didn't want to get high, so i stopped.

some people would say that i wasn't truly addicted if i could just turn it off like that, but i know that's not correct. i was completely hooked. i think i just replaced it with something else.. i didn't force myself to stop, i just truly WANTED to.

so i guess what i'm saying is that if you truly think this is a problem.. if you want to slow down.. you have to realize that the path your on could lead to some bad places. i think saying "it's not serious, not yet at least" is a way of trying to fool yourself. even though it might be a little bit a weed and a couple of beers, you are obviously dependent at this point. now, i'm not necessarily saying that you're a full blown addict and you're destroying your life, because 1) i dont know you and 2) i didnt get that from what you were saying. and maybe your concerns stem from those around you and how you think you should feel, but don't really reflect your personal views on getting high and/or drunk. it's just really what you think is right for yourself.

[almightyseancore]

yeah, thats exactly it. i don't think it's ruining my life by any means, but i think these cravings are warning signs.

my "self medication" has never effected anyone but myself, and my money. never ruined a relationship, never late on a bill or anything because i had to get fucked up instead. i've always had my shit together, i just felt better while doing it.

i've already chilled out though. i've been smoking twice a day instead of all day, and i decided to go without beer the last two days. had a few today though, and they felt great.

so i dunno.

i think i just need to cut back, not quit.

at lest til i'm at a point where i don't have cravings anymore.

my concerns mostly stem from my family, and how fucked up most of them are.

but i think i have a tad bit more self control than they do.

[oakland]

I got clean about five years ago from methadone. It was a horrible, hellish experience but I don't regret it at all, although there are certainly times when I've really wanted to get high. The truth is you will only get more and more hazy as life goes on if you keep on this path. I'm not a drug/alcohol nazi, so do your thing. But don't lie to yourself. Pot is nothing like methadone, I assure you of that. But if you need it to be "normal," then it's a problem pure and simple.

Once I got over the withdrawals, I liked music more, I cried at the drop of a hat for a while, I was happy to see people I liked. To whit, I was beginning to feel what it feels like to experience emotions. And that's what most people are trying not to do by getting high. But like I said, if you're ok with that fine. Your call.

[somethingvinyl]

A point of reference:

Answer yes or no to the following seven questions. Most questions have more than one part, because everyone behaves slightly differently in addiction. You only need to answer yes to one part for that question to count as a positive response.

1. Tolerance. Has your use of drugs or alcohol increased over time?

2. Withdrawal. When you stop using, have you ever experienced physical or emotional withdrawal? Have you had any of the following symptoms: irritability, anxiety, shakes, sweats, nausea, or vomiting?

3. Difficulty controlling your use. Do you sometimes use more or for a longer time than you would like? Do you sometimes drink to get drunk? Do you stop after a few drink usually, or does one drink lead to more drinks?

4. Negative consequences. Have you continued to use even though there have been negative consequences to your mood, self-esteem, health, job, or family?

5. Neglecting or postponing activities. Have you ever put off or reduced social, recreational, work, or household activities because of your use?

6. Spending significant time or emotional energy. Have you spent a significant amount of time obtaining, using, concealing, planning, or recovering from your use? Have you spend a lot of time thinking about using? Have you ever concealed or minimized your use? Have you ever thought of schemes to avoid getting caught?

7. Desire to cut down. Have you sometimes thought about cutting down or controlling your use? Have you ever made unsuccessful attempts to cut down or control your use?

If you answered yes to at least 3 of these questions, then you meet the medical definition of addiction. This definition is based on the of American Psychiatric Association (DSM-IV) and the World Health Organization (ICD-10) criteria.

[almightyseancore]

yuh.

i am pretty wise on the subject, thats how i know.

doin' an alocohol free day again today.

and i got all 3 kids at home all day with no car and no money so it's definately going to happen.

i might smoke once or twice, but thats neither here nor there.