Guest Posted June 10, 2013 Share Posted June 10, 2013 why doesn’t she trust you? does she know something about you, or does she just have trust issues in general? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted June 10, 2013 Share Posted June 10, 2013 on the oof thing, sorry girl but i can't back you up. oof reminds me of the sound someone makes when they get the wind knocked out of them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted June 10, 2013 Share Posted June 10, 2013 general trust issues. i have 0 reputation as being untrustworthy. thursday night, we were having a full conversation via text, and as i was about to go to bed, she was like "i think i need some space" (as i'm going away for 3 days) i had no idea what she was on about, and then she was saying she's worried i'll hurt her. went back through the conversation, and was able to find where the tone changed- she literally just took something i said completely the wrong way and got bent out of shape over it. all i could do from there was go into reassuring damage control. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BuzzersonKillwell Posted June 10, 2013 Share Posted June 10, 2013 thursday night, we were having a full conversation via text, Isn't this kind of an oxymoron? I don't know about your generation..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted June 10, 2013 Share Posted June 10, 2013 i don't either man. i do know that my generation has the ability to watch a red sox game, an nba finals game, listen to a record, browse the internet, and chat with a significant other at the same damn time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
controlthebleeding Posted June 10, 2013 Share Posted June 10, 2013 i don't either man. i do know that my generation has the ability to watch a red sox game, an nba finals game, listen to a record, browse the internet, and chat with a significant other at the same damn time. but does your generation know the feeling of satisfaction you get when arguing with someone on the phone, and getting so riled up you just say "FUCK YOU!" and slam the phone down on the ringer? or do you just say "FUCK YOU!" and then tap "hang up" on your smart phone? roadmonkey 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dashhax Posted June 10, 2013 Share Posted June 10, 2013 this is going to be rough. saturday night, my girl went down to providence to party with some friends. around 3 am i got a string of drunken texts, and tucked right in the middle of it all was this gem: "just punched some guy in the face for kissing me" the whole time i've been away this weekend, we haven't talked on the phone. it's mostly been bad timing and shitty service, but after that i kind of avoided it. i certainly need to know exactly what the situation was, but as was initially pointed out- you dont just get close enough to someone to kiss them out of no where. and this is after she went kind of crazy the night before i left going on about how she doesn't fully trust me yet.. A guy kissed her and she has trust issues with you? Are you sure she isn't playing mind games with you to see how you react to someone kissing her? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted June 10, 2013 Share Posted June 10, 2013 i'm assuming that's what it is. i'm still not sure how to address it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zick Posted June 10, 2013 Share Posted June 10, 2013 i don't either man. i do know that my generation has the ability to watch a red sox game, an nba finals game, listen to a record, browse the internet, and chat with a significant other at the same damn time. I watch sports, I flip records at the same damn time Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted June 10, 2013 Share Posted June 10, 2013 sports and video games are my favorite activities for spinning Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dashhax Posted June 10, 2013 Share Posted June 10, 2013 i'm assuming that's what it is. i'm still not sure how to address it. I don't know how much you care about this girl but if you guys are starting to get serious worrying about her at bars might not be healthy for the relationship. I'd constantly be worrying about what she was doing who she was seeing. Unless you can talk to her about it and tell her it bothers you that she is getting drunk. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted June 10, 2013 Share Posted June 10, 2013 i'm assuming that's what it is. i'm still not sure how to address it. I'd just ask her how exactly it got to the point that a guy thought kissing her was warranted. this is how I go about it... she should still be able to go out and have fun with her friends right, but there shouldn’t be any gray area... she should tell any dudes hitting on her that she has a boyfriend and to back off. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted June 10, 2013 Share Posted June 10, 2013 ...or do you just say "FUCK YOU!" and then tap "hang up" on your smart phone? The mental picture of this (the rage-tap?) is friggin' high-larious! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted June 10, 2013 Share Posted June 10, 2013 my ex would do the temper tantrum phone throw. I always knew when it happened because I'd hear a bunch of loud noises then him swearing in the background. He went through 3 or 4 blackberrys throughout the course of our relationship. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
paranoidantroyd Posted June 10, 2013 Share Posted June 10, 2013 Drama. Never been a fan. Once I sense it, I turn the other way and never look back. Never regretted it. Live life in the windshield, fuck the rearview mirror. circuit bored records 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted June 10, 2013 Share Posted June 10, 2013 so i thought she was at a house party, when it was actually a big ass club style event. she said there was this one group of dudes who just wouldnt leave them alone. and while trying to fend them off, her friend was drunk enough to just kind of go with what they were offering. sounds like they were just persistant and one guy leaned in on my girl. i didnt even bring it up during the phone call. i was just letting her talk to see if it came up. and even getting the story, i just shrugged it off really. hopefully i see her tonight, because i would like to bring it up in person to really make it a point that i'm uncomfortable with it. i'm also wondering if i should ask the girls who she was with (who i was friends with before we met). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bigbruise Posted June 10, 2013 Share Posted June 10, 2013 so i thought she was at a house party, when it was actually a big ass club style event. she said there was this one group of dudes who just wouldnt leave them alone. and while trying to fend them off, her friend was drunk enough to just kind of go with what they were offering. sounds like they were just persistant and one guy leaned in on my girl. i didnt even bring it up during the phone call. i was just letting her talk to see if it came up. and even getting the story, i just shrugged it off really. hopefully i see her tonight, because i would like to bring it up in person to really make it a point that i'm uncomfortable with it. i'm also wondering if i should ask the girls who she was with (who i was friends with before we met). You probably shouldn't. Find out everything you want to know from her, she's your girl, have her back, man. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abovetheearth Posted June 10, 2013 Share Posted June 10, 2013 there was a time i didnt have my girls back. she was fresh out of a relationship and i was too. we started off friends, and her friends make the wonderful whites of west virginia look like sesame street puppeteers. they would harass us every night. get in my face. call her a bitch, call me names. her ex was a MMA fighter and the other nuts worked construction. as i was about to get up to 'try' something...she whispered "dont, they will kill you" it was very sweet. but i listened. i sat there and as she cried i grabbed her and and we left. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sinisterkidd Posted June 10, 2013 Share Posted June 10, 2013 Yea im a phone thrower. With the occasional chuck at the ground and stomp on it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
suchashorttime Posted June 10, 2013 Share Posted June 10, 2013 Ry, those situations suck the most! I can't imagine it, because I've never put myself in situation where cheating could happen. I've had girls pull that same shit, though. I could never figure out what kind of situation leads to such results. I'd give the benefit of the doubt, but she should be VERY cognizant of the different ways you could be interpreting it and do her best to let you know she's not putting herself in those situations on the reg. It sucks that it's a newer thing, so you don't know what to expect of her. Seems like she was straight with you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thebiglebowski Posted June 10, 2013 Share Posted June 10, 2013 My 2 cents: Seems like no big deal to me. I would say "So you are telling me that some guy ambush kissed you, you pulled away, and the whole thing lasted under 2 seconds, right?" If she says yes with no hesitation, let it go. Something like "well I believe you and it's good you didn't keep it from me. Just hope you get out of that situation earlier next time". And if you suspect otherwise, what's the worst case? She kissed a guy? Yeah, that sucks. But judging the level of interest in this girl and the length of time you have been seeing her, why ruin it? Sounds like you really rushed into something (sex right away and a lot of daily communication). Normal timeline is that you would still be "talking" or "dating but not exclusive" right now. I'd set things back to just "dating", give her some space, and move forward on a normal timeline. She probably kissed someone else last month before you. Who cares? Focus on the future, not the past. There isn't enough past here (unlike people who have been committed for months or years) to hold onto. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted June 10, 2013 Share Posted June 10, 2013 that's probably the best advice i've gotten in this thread. i would say that this 'incident' mixed with having a few days away from each other has made it a lot easier to be lax about the relationship. for a couple weeks, it was the only thing on my mind, and we were seeing each other every day basically. now i'm not even sure when i'll see her this week. of course i look forward to it, but i'm not bent out of shape about it. it'll be a shame if the honeymoon stage is over, but i certainly wouldn't be opposed to taking on a much more normal couple's path now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thebiglebowski Posted June 10, 2013 Share Posted June 10, 2013 Cool man. Glad I said something helpful. I'd say take the week off, and if you decide to pursue her again then take her out on a "real" date this weekend. Not sure what your style is or how you've been doing it but dress up, open the car door for her, fine dining, etc. Not just casually inviting her to the bar or to watch a movie. Kinda like a symbolic event to V2.0. Or maybe you decide you are done and just get what you can until it is over. You'll feel it out. Those are the 2 paths I would take. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted June 10, 2013 Share Posted June 10, 2013 i don't date like a chump! took her out for a fancy dinner before i left. we've gone out quite a bit actually... to the point where we agreed that we need to stop being so damn expensive together. but she's really been taken by it, because she's never had a guy really treat her like a woman apparently. that kind of started the whole trust thing the other night, because she mistook something i said for me saying that the chivalry wasn't going to last. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BuzzersonKillwell Posted June 11, 2013 Share Posted June 11, 2013 I think the more you consider this an "incident" and react accordingly the shittier things will get. Girls get hit on, so do dudes. Half of a solid relationship is not letting isolated bullshit blossom into something more. It's new, I get it. But let's save the drama for things that are worthy. Otherwise you'll burn hot and flame out fast. Which is fine and fun, but not what your looking for... I think. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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