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My USPS saga comes to an end


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you can say that again. I have a ton of insane texts saved from when I had to provide proof to my ex’s probation officer. he wished death/AIDs upon me a lot.

my apartment has also been broken into twice while I was away for the weekend. nothing stolen, but my closet was torn apart.

jesus I really am a crazy magent.

 

 

That was me.

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Please tell them to direct their dollars to me.

 

 

I will one up you and say that I will actually break records in my collection for donations.  For your generosity I will include a video of me breaking the record along with a commemorative shard from said broken record.  Shards will be hand numbered.

 

Screw ebay, breaking records is my route to quick cash.

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Think about it. A guy could come by, say, Tuesday night, 3 in the morning, dump your trash in one of those 30-gallon plastic sacks. Haul it down to an abandoned lot and bingo! There it is. What a lady eats, how often she shaves. He can even tell a lady's time of the month. Anything you want to know. What kind of lipstick she wears, and used condoms. How often's she gettin' it? Twice a week? Three times? The same guy, different guys?

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That's why sensible people twist their used condoms up and throw them out the driver side window at oncoming cars on the drive home.

 

this is fucking hilarious.

 

in honor of your great comment, i present you with this:

 

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