-tess. Posted July 22, 2014 Share Posted July 22, 2014 Honestly the whole texting thing right off the bat is kinda a pain, call me a dinosaur, but I prefered to talk to a girl on the phone. Texting just makes the whole thing even start unreal. Like you are just another in a long line of texts. I say if it feels right then just do it, if not then don't worry about it. Texting, calling, whatever. If the other person has a hang up, that's their issue. I would rather just talk in person you know? Texting is the least ideal way to communicate. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
roadmonkey Posted July 22, 2014 Share Posted July 22, 2014 Talking in person is also rad, however these days it seems that getting someone to spend 10 minutes to get coffee as an introduction is damn near impossible haha. God forbid you meet for 10 minutes to get a general idea and then plan more or not after that. There's this dating service thing that you need a group of friends and you essentially go out on a group date with another group. I wonder if I can get some dudes to go in with me on this thing. Ahh here it is: https://www.joingrouper.com/ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
radiatorhums Posted July 22, 2014 Share Posted July 22, 2014 Honestly the whole texting thing right off the bat is kinda a pain, call me a dinosaur, but I prefered to talk to a girl on the phone. Texting just makes the whole thing even start unreal. Like you are just another in a long line of texts. I say if it feels right then just do it, if not then don't worry about it. Texting, calling, whatever. If the other person has a hang up, that's their issue. I mostly like starting out with texting. It gives me some time to think about my responses and get over my initial nervousness. On the flip side of that, waiting for a response can be really unpleasant. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
parkinglot Posted July 22, 2014 Share Posted July 22, 2014 Question for the girls: So this girl and I had originally planned to just go for coffee, but I asked if she wanted to go to the Modest Mouse show instead, if her ticket would be free. She said that that would be awesome etc. (Why do I spend my money on the things I do?) Anyways, would that be a big deal to you if you were supposed to go for coffee, but now the dude buys you a ticket to see Modest Mouse instead? I'm obviously over thinking this, but this is the first time we've hung out in months and she realizes I just bought her a $45 ticket... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Out of Breath Records Posted July 22, 2014 Share Posted July 22, 2014 My biggest piece of advice would be to not answer right away. SO IT IS A THING, I always thought this was like just some weird cliche stereotype idea. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Out of Breath Records Posted July 22, 2014 Share Posted July 22, 2014 Question for the girls: So this girl and I had originally planned to just go for coffee, but I asked if she wanted to go to the Modest Mouse show instead, if her ticket would be free. She said that that would be awesome etc. (Why do I spend my money on the things I do?) Anyways, would that be a big deal to you if you were supposed to go for coffee, but now the dude buys you a ticket to see Modest Mouse instead? I'm obviously over thinking this, but this is the first time we've hung out in months and she realizes I just bought her a $45 ticket... As long as she knows what your intentions are I see no problem. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
roadmonkey Posted July 22, 2014 Share Posted July 22, 2014 You're overthinking it, most likely she's excited to go.. If she wasn't she wouldn't have said yes. You can always get a coffee, beer, at the concert between bands and talk then or even after. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
laralaurent Posted July 22, 2014 Share Posted July 22, 2014 Question for the girls: So this girl and I had originally planned to just go for coffee, but I asked if she wanted to go to the Modest Mouse show instead, if her ticket would be free. She said that that would be awesome etc. (Why do I spend my money on the things I do?) Anyways, would that be a big deal to you if you were supposed to go for coffee, but now the dude buys you a ticket to see Modest Mouse instead? I'm obviously over thinking this, but this is the first time we've hung out in months and she realizes I just bought her a $45 ticket... You're overthinking. Coffee is cute but if a guy bought me a ticket to see a band I like? Swoon. Should make for a good start! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
parkinglot Posted July 22, 2014 Share Posted July 22, 2014 Yeah. It's just weird because we were really close for a while over the winter and always hung out, went for coffee, movies, hugged, kissed, and now it's been 4 months since we've hung out and I have no idea where we stand. I guess this is a start. Thanks for the answers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted July 22, 2014 Share Posted July 22, 2014 Ugh. I'm awful at this. If I'm interested, I act interested. So bad at the "game" I feel it. When I was single I would just try and occupy my time and not always be glued to my phone ready to send an immediate response. This way he realizes you are an awesome, busy, in demand woman which you obviously are I had crazy respect for any guy who called me and didn't text, I loved that! But in the end, games are just games, and I hated them as well. Besides not answering right away, I was pretty up front with my feelings, and always followed through when I made plans with a dude. honesty is refreshing I think. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Family Friendly Rap God Posted July 22, 2014 Share Posted July 22, 2014 When I lived with my girlfriends I would dictate their texts to guys. I was so good, dammit. My biggest piece of advice would be to not answer right away. I hated that!! Lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
-tess. Posted July 22, 2014 Share Posted July 22, 2014 Talking in person is also rad, however these days it seems that getting someone to spend 10 minutes to get coffee as an introduction is damn near impossible haha. God forbid you meet for 10 minutes to get a general idea and then plan more or not after that. There's this dating service thing that you need a group of friends and you essentially go out on a group date with another group. I wonder if I can get some dudes to go in with me on this thing. Ahh here it is: https://www.joingrouper.com/ That sounds intriguing.... Minus the fact that I have no friends here. sooo..... I have been doing tinder. Which is weird. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
-tess. Posted July 22, 2014 Share Posted July 22, 2014 Question for the girls: So this girl and I had originally planned to just go for coffee, but I asked if she wanted to go to the Modest Mouse show instead, if her ticket would be free. She said that that would be awesome etc. (Why do I spend my money on the things I do?) Anyways, would that be a big deal to you if you were supposed to go for coffee, but now the dude buys you a ticket to see Modest Mouse instead? I'm obviously over thinking this, but this is the first time we've hung out in months and she realizes I just bought her a $45 ticket... I think it is awesome. But that is just me. Some girls get weirded out. If she is one of those, then she is a dumbass and you deserve better. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
roadmonkey Posted July 22, 2014 Share Posted July 22, 2014 That sounds intriguing.... Minus the fact that I have no friends here. sooo..... I have been doing tinder. Which is weird. Awww I'll be your friend come out to Oakland, we'll hang. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
-tess. Posted July 22, 2014 Share Posted July 22, 2014 I feel it. When I was single I would just try and occupy my time and not always be glued to my phone ready to send an immediate response. This way he realizes you are an awesome, busy, in demand woman which you obviously are I had crazy respect for any guy who called me and didn't text, I loved that! But in the end, games are just games, and I hated them as well. Besides not answering right away, I was pretty up front with my feelings, and always followed through when I made plans with a dude. honesty is refreshing I think. Ya, minus the fact that he is kind of slow to answer too. Why can't we just be normal and talk normally!? I hate technology sometimes. It just creates barriers that make things even more confusing. This guy and I have hung out before, we have gotten drinks, gone to the beach and once I made him dinner at his house. I thought we were hanging out as friends. He had said more of his friends were going to come and then he was like just kidding! We just had fun and enjoyed the awesome foods I made. But again I thought this all was as friends... well. He recently asked me out, on a date. And I was pretty confused. And now I am super nervous! I think we are going out tonight? But he is really bad at communicating. No solid plans have been made and I am not one to sit around. Just not really sure what I am supposed to do. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
-tess. Posted July 22, 2014 Share Posted July 22, 2014 Awww I'll be your friend come out to Oakland, we'll hang. Are you an axe murderer? Do you have long finger nails? Do you have creepily soft hands? These are deal breakers when I make new friends. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Family Friendly Rap God Posted July 22, 2014 Share Posted July 22, 2014 Are you an axe murderer? Do you have long finger nails? Do you have creepily soft hands? These are deal breakers when I make new friends. What's wrong with soft hands? I feel discrimated against! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
-tess. Posted July 22, 2014 Share Posted July 22, 2014 What's wrong with soft hands? I feel discrimated against! I have this weird association with creepy soft hands and guys that get off and play video games all day. It must be all of the Vaseline. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
roadmonkey Posted July 22, 2014 Share Posted July 22, 2014 Are you an axe murderer? Do you have long finger nails? Do you have creepily soft hands? These are deal breakers when I make new friends. I've watch So I married an Axe Murderer a lot (Required Movie to see when living in the Bay Area That, Big Trouble in Little China, Bullitt, and The Rock) I have a kinda nervous tick that causes me to bite my nails so no long nails there... and no I do not have creepily soft hands.. Though I have been known to use lotion cause they get dry working in the datacenter. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shelby Posted July 22, 2014 Share Posted July 22, 2014 Sometimes I play videogames all day, but my hands are far from soft haha. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
laralaurent Posted July 23, 2014 Share Posted July 23, 2014 Ya, minus the fact that he is kind of slow to answer too. Why can't we just be normal and talk normally!? I hate technology sometimes. It just creates barriers that make things even more confusing. This guy and I have hung out before, we have gotten drinks, gone to the beach and once I made him dinner at his house. I thought we were hanging out as friends. He had said more of his friends were going to come and then he was like just kidding! We just had fun and enjoyed the awesome foods I made. But again I thought this all was as friends... well. He recently asked me out, on a date. And I was pretty confused. And now I am super nervous! I think we are going out tonight? But he is really bad at communicating. No solid plans have been made and I am not one to sit around. Just not really sure what I am supposed to do. girl, take the lead! just call him and ask what's up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
-tess. Posted July 23, 2014 Share Posted July 23, 2014 girl, take the lead! just call him and ask what's up. Well. He texted me before I read this. He flaked basically. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
laralaurent Posted July 23, 2014 Share Posted July 23, 2014 Well. He texted me before I read this. He flaked basically. I consider that a cardinal sin when someone cancels plans via text instead of calling. But then again, I have a strong aversion to how lazy dating can be. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Family Friendly Rap God Posted July 23, 2014 Share Posted July 23, 2014 Sometimes I play videogames all day, but my hands are far from soft haha. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
-tess. Posted July 23, 2014 Share Posted July 23, 2014 I consider that a cardinal sin when someone cancels plans via text instead of calling. But then again, I have a strong aversion to how lazy dating can be. Yeah. I am not too impressed. He said he isn't feeling well. I have a hard time believing dudes when they say that. I mean, if you changed your mind or found someone hotter to go out with, you can just say it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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