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CONFESSIONS


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there was already a confessions thread?? wow, I haven't read the whole thing yet, but it got deep in here.

 

i read it all and it felt like postsecret. it was strangely therapeutic. i must admit i'm a sucker for shit like this. i guess it makes me feel better knowing i'm not the only coward in the world suppressing thoughts or feelings.

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I’ll do a real confession. Literally no one knows this but me, because it’s really shitty and I still hate that I did it. I dated this guy in high school, His dad sold pills. He got arrested for something stupid and was sent to an ‘alternative’ school. But left a ton of vicodin at my house. I sold it all and bought my first car. A 94 chevy lumina. I never saw him again. My parents thought I had an after-school job and were really proud.

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This is a really serious confession that not many people know: my first CD was Boyz II Men "II" and my first cassette was the Space Jam soundtrack. BORN PUNK.

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The only reason I went away to college was to please my father. 

I don't believe I will use my current degree for anything. 

I'm jealous of my best friend of 13 years because he is becoming a lawyer and makes 8x what I do a year. 

I'm super afraid of becoming addicted to anything. I've stopped drinking and smoking weed in the last 3 years because of this. 

I feel so appreciated in my family life yet I want to move out more than anything.

I feel like I don't deserve the friends I have. 

I deleted my photo to post on this thread.

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Confessions?  No thanks, I'll stick to burying everything deep down inside, until it becomes a giant dark mass that consumes me.  It's all I know and I'm good at it dammit.  

 

I have one.  I've had writers block for almost two months now; I can't write a thing- songs, stories, even a fucking poem.  I really really hate it.

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I’ll do a real confession. Literally no one knows this but me, because it’s really shitty and I still hate that I did it. I dated this guy in high school, His dad sold pills. He got arrested for something stupid and was sent to an ‘alternative’ school. But left a ton of vicodin at my house. I sold it all and bought my first car. A 94 chevy lumina. I never saw him again. My parents thought I had an after-school job and were really proud.

Well you kinda were working. Those pills didn't sell themselves.

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I’ll do a real confession. Literally no one knows this but me, because it’s really shitty and I still hate that I did it. I dated this guy in high school, His dad sold pills. He got arrested for something stupid and was sent to an ‘alternative’ school. But left a ton of vicodin at my house. I sold it all and bought my first car. A 94 chevy lumina. I never saw him again. My parents thought I had an after-school job and were really proud.

 

Vinyl Collectives most innocent looking Drug Kingpin!

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Yeah, I bite my tongue a lot when it comes to a bunch of music stuff posted here. I'll even have posts all typed out and then decide not to post them. YOU HEAR THAT, VC? I TRY TO NOT BE A DICK FOR YOU. YOU ARE WELCOME.

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I guess I'll go:

-I'm a great actor, I fake happiness so fucking well, but inside I just want to cry and drink myself to death. All my friends are hollow we only speak at school I never go out I'm never contacted first.

-The closest thing I've had to a friend is this one girl who at one point we were prettyclose she's the only person to make me turly happy she's know more about my mental health than my mom, so I fell for her and became clingy she's the closest think to a lover I've ever but she's a stone fox and still can't get over her.

-Sad thing is I sorta don't want to because the small memories I have keep me happy in a nostalgia melancholy way so I hold on to them so tight

-I have have a couples of mental illnesses and should be taking pills but my mom thinks I'm over them and don't want to bother her/worry her and am not going to.

I could say more but I don't want to bother you guys with a long post.

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Getting help for whatever mental issues you are going through will be much less of a burden to you and your mom then going through the problems that can arise due to them. Asking for help is the best thing you can do in that situation. It may take time and work, but once you come out feeling better everyone will feel relieved.

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Agree with Rad.  Odd to see a serious post from the Radman.  I had to like it purely for the rarity of it.

 

The problem won't go away on it's own so either you need to get some help in pill form or help through talking with someone trained at dealing with someone with mental disorders.  Also the Man Advice Thread on here is a nice place to get things off your chest and just unload a bit.

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Agree with Rad.  Odd to see a serious post from the Radman.  I had to like it purely for the rarity of it.

 

The problem won't go away on it's own so either you need to get some help in pill form or help through talking with someone trained at dealing with someone with mental disorders.  Also the Man Advice Thread on here is a nice place to get things off your chest and just unload a bit.

No, I understand you care and all, but I have to be close to you to open up. I don't know it's hard to explain I don''t want to worry my mom I know I should but I do decent on my own. Also I don't like to get asked how my day was let alone "what's bothering you?" It really scares my mom, like lately she's been worrying that I might be purging again and I don't want to worry her, like that. I don't know plus opening up to a stranger just to get pills isn't my thing. I don't know maybe after I move out, but for now, no.

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