CONFESSIONS

[BuzzersonKillwell]

I'm successful by everyone I knows standards yet still feel like I'm struggling to succeed. It is the stress of defining success and happiness that makes me most unhappy. I need to reassess my goals in the short term but can't bring myself to lowering my standards. Repeat cycle. 

 

Man. I feel the same way. You want to set your quality bar really high, but for me, the local job opportunities can't often meet it. So your stuck between balancing ambition, quality of life and not making all work related decisions solely through the lens of "What is best for my career".

 

Sprinkle in a little bit of not being quite as good as you think you are, and we are in the same boat. Recently I've started focusing on long-term plans instead of short-term plans, then at least I can be treading water a bit in the interim but still be making progress. 

[jerseydave77]

My problem at times is that I've had my attempts at starting my own company fail. I am trying again. I watch people garner funding and make films that I know I can execute better. There are definitely many better than me in my field, that doesn't irk me. It's seeing folks waste opportunities that I am constantly and desperately pushing for. I'm an optimist, I know it will happen. It's frustrating in the interim. 

[futures]

I can relate to that.  It is so frustrating to see people who clearly have less training, talent, execution abilities, whatever you want to call it, be able to do what you feel like you should be doing with such ease.  I used to work in a camera shop which is also a professional print shop, so I - being professionally trained with a degree in photography - would see these people who decided to buy a camera because they just got their refund check, and in 3 months time would be dropping off hard drive after hard drive of images to be printed whilst filing for an LLC because they've gained enough of a following to qualify as a business and, better yet, quit their day job to become a full time photographer.  I had to get out of that environment because it was hindering my vision to do what it is I wanted to do.

 

I'm rooting for you, Dave.  Your time will come and when it does, it'll for sure pay off for you.  You seem like such a determined individual.  You'll be rewarded for it.

[jerseydave77]

Thanks. 

 

Trust me, I am grateful for the success I've had and the fact that my work gets a public reception. My problem is wanting more. That's both a motivator and a curse. 

[gmoney]

Would love to see said movie materials..............

........................

........................

[jerseydave77]

Confession:

I promised a board member a stack of my work about three months ago. They sit in a pile in my home office on top of a padded envelope but I have yet to ship them. I'm lame. 

[gmoney]

 

Note: I think Dave is awesome and don't care if I get said movies tomorrow or in a a year.

[jerseydave77]

Did I see today that you started a firm? 

[gmoney]

Confession:

 

My dad is an architect. In one month, I graduate from Architecture school. I've worked for him the past four years. He has a successful firm that I should be happy and proud to take over, but I want to do something on my own. I don't  necessarily love the kind of work he does. 

 

But he wants me here, and takes pride in my being here. And he's given me a job for four years in school, when it probably wasn't convenient or what was best for the company at the time.

 

My wife and I also don't love this town, and feel the aching to move somewhere larger.

 

But we are starting community living this month. Which should be SWEET.

[jerseydave77]

Ah. Now I see. 

[aviolentworld]

Confession:

 

My dad is an architect. In one month, I graduate from Architecture school. I've worked for him the past four years. He has a successful firm that I should be happy and proud to take over, but I want to do something on my own. I don't  necessarily love the kind of work he does. 

 

But he wants me here, and takes pride in my being here. And he's given me a job for four years in school, when it probably wasn't convenient or what was best for the company at the time.

 

My wife and I also don't love this town, and feel the aching to move somewhere larger.

 

But we are starting community living this month. Which should be SWEET.

 

kinda same boat but not really

 

i didn't go to school and have been with my current job for 13+ years. i have a lot of money invested with stocks and 401k but i think it's time to move on for me.

 

my step dad owns an automobile shop and i am kinda thinking of going into the trade and keeping the shop in his name.  i mean i would love to learn the business and eventually take it over.  i am more of a hands on guy and think i would like doing what he does.  i also think it's a little too late since i'm 32. who knows.

[aviolentworld]

also

 

gifts > memes......specially when an ass or boob is involved.

[futures]

Confession:

 

My dad is an architect. In one month, I graduate from Architecture school. I've worked for him the past four years. He has a successful firm that I should be happy and proud to take over, but I want to do something on my own. I don't  necessarily love the kind of work he does. 

 

But he wants me here, and takes pride in my being here. And he's given me a job for four years in school, when it probably wasn't convenient or what was best for the company at the time.

 

My wife and I also don't love this town, and feel the aching to move somewhere larger.

 

But we are starting community living this month. Which should be SWEET.

Aside from the idea of possibly moving to a different city, would it be an option to take over the firm but add your own spin on the design elements, or whatever the differences are that you feel you and your father have?  Or is he expecting you to take over and continue with the clientele and style he has created over the years?

 

My boyfriend is an architect and he currently works in a two man operation.  It's him and the guy who owns the firm.  The guy already has mentioned that he expects my boyfriend to work for him until the end of days, but I know that he wants to start his own firm one day, so I can see that situation getting pretty sticky somewhere down the line.  Looks like he'll have to make the same kind of decision that you're faced with to some degree.

[bigbruise]

also

 

gifts > memes......specially when an ass or boob is involved.

 

Everybody knows they're "gif(s)" right? I was just being a smart ass quoting Madies error.

[aviolentworld]

Everybody knows they're "gif(s)" right? I was just being a smart ass quoting Madies error.

 

 

haha yeah dude i was just continuing with the fun.

 

i'm not that old you whippersnapper.

[bigbruise]

Shit, I ruined it.

[scottheisel]

kinda same boat but not really

 

i didn't go to school and have been with my current job for 13+ years. i have a lot of money invested with stocks and 401k but i think it's time to move on for me.

 

my step dad owns an automobile shop and i am kinda thinking of going into the trade and keeping the shop in his name.  i mean i would love to learn the business and eventually take it over.  i am more of a hands on guy and think i would like doing what he does.  i also think it's a little too late since i'm 32. who knows.

 

Also kinda same boat but not really: My dad has run his own insurance brokerage company for the past 20ish years (before that, he had a partner, and before that he worked for Prudential, so insurance has pretty much been his life's work). He recently closed down his office and let his secretary go, moving everything into the basement of his and my mom's house, where he's keeping the business alive only in a reduced state. He's more or less semi-retired only not by choice; the money has just started to dry up in his business.

 

He has three kids (including me) and none of us have ever showed any interest whatsoever in taking over his business. I think a lot about that, and I wonder if we disappointed him because we chose to go in other directions. I also wonder sometimes if it would be too late to learn how to run his business and take it over for him (although it would mean going back to school, for sure). A lot of these feelings just go back to the constant thought that I haven't lived up to my parents' expectations, even though they've never said anything to even insinuate that.

[dreamover]

I'm successful by everyone I knows standards yet still feel like I'm struggling to succeed. It is the stress of defining success and happiness that makes me most unhappy. I need to reassess my goals in the short term but can't bring myself to lowering my standards. Repeat cycle. 

 

dude! you've made it. you're a VC mod!

[jerseydave77]

dude! you've made it. you're a VC mod!

 

Ha ha. Yet I can still only Like a post one time. 

[icecream]

This is extremely self important but what better thread.

 

I have one relative that is normal. 

my aunt and dad both have progressive cancer and my other three uncles are all severe alcoholics.

I have no job and have stayed at home to help take care of my dad. I concentrate on not having a career more often than not.

 

On the upside though i'm not as much of an introvert and I have a girlfriend that I really like and it's mutual.

 

marriage,being stuck in a factory forever and living in the same house forever are some of my worst fears. 

[oohdoiloveyou]

I've been too scared to really tell anyone or get treated for my depression and every year I end up in the same situation, close to failing out of school and completely helpless. I know I have to change things, but I feel like it's not even worth it anymore. I'm just so fucking ashamed.

[suchashorttime]

I've been too scared to really tell anyone or get treated for my depression and every year I end up in the same situation, close to failing out of school and completely helpless. I know I have to change things, but I feel like it's not even worth it anymore. I'm just so fucking ashamed.

YO.  make use of your school's metal health offices.  most - if not all - colleges have 'em, and they usually offer really decent FREE treatment to students.  i used to go during my undergrad, usually around finals when stress got crazy, but i had friends that were able to see real docs through the office and got good help.

[oohdoiloveyou]

What kind of treatments?

[suchashorttime]

What kind of treatments?

i've seen them treat stress, anxiety, and depression.  if your college offers it, it's totally something to look into.  i think if you're anywhere from considering it to needing it on the spectrum of necessity, it becomes a "why not?!" sort of thing.  it certainly can't hurt.  and if you don't like your therapist or doc, you can request another one.  it's all for you!

[213041284s]

What kind of treatments?

 

I recently started using my school's services, there are probably slight differences between each place, but you can get group therapy or individual counseling session from a psychiatrist - all centered on your individual needs. All for free! of course, the only downside is that scheduling appointments can be a bit difficult, especially if you go to a large school, but really, it's worth it. Don't be afraid to  make the call!