paintedinexile Posted December 1, 2013 Share Posted December 1, 2013 My girlfriend got drunk the other night, and demanded that we have sex. In the middle of it, she proceeds to tell me that she fakes it every time we do it. So that was pretty awesome. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted December 1, 2013 Share Posted December 1, 2013 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
suchashorttime Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 My girlfriend got drunk the other night, and demanded that we have sex. In the middle of it, she proceeds to tell me that she fakes it every time we do it. So that was pretty awesome. that went from being awesome to terrible right quick. sorry bud. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jase Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 My girlfriend got drunk the other night, and demanded that we have sex. In the middle of it, she proceeds to tell me that she fakes it every time we do it. So that was pretty awesome. Sounds like she wants some excitement. I demand that next time you two are being 'intimate', half way through you jam your D in her A. No warning, no lube, no taking no for an answer. Of course, you don't really have to. ozfacter and Tommy 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
deafening Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 No warning, no lube, no taking no for an answer. Now that's just evil, but probably not quite as evil as what she did. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
weinerdog Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 Had no idea there is also a Blumpkin drink......ugh A cocktail tribute to the time-honored tradition of receiving oral sex while defecating:* In a porcelain bowl mix 1oz vodka and 1oz creme de cacao over ice.* Float in two to three Tootsie Rolls* Garnish with several kernels of corn* Top with a blast of whipped cream Tommy, castaway and deafening 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Vool Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 My girlfriend got drunk the other night, and demanded that we have sex. In the middle of it, she proceeds to tell me that she fakes it every time we do it. So that was pretty awesome. Next time you have sex, tell her you don't care about her pleasure and that it's only about you jizzin'! Actually, this is just how it is... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcguirk Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 Stuck it in pooper for the first time. Tommy 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Vool Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 Stuck it in pooper for the first time. Did it hurt? trevorxramage 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
radiatorhums Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 Did it hurt? http://youtu.be/4dOsbsuhYGQ?t=1m Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcguirk Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 Did it hurt? Considering I only inserted 5 of about 10" I guess not. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Vool Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 Considering I only inserted 5 of about 10" I guess not. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=McV7pjwVFbE Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcguirk Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 I wish he would just die already. Tommy 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dillhole Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 Johnny Cash? He died a little over 10 years ago. And his version of Hurt is way better then NIN's. themeconspiracy and agaetisbyrjun 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcguirk Posted December 3, 2013 Share Posted December 3, 2013 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StrangeTerrain Posted December 3, 2013 Share Posted December 3, 2013 I reached my max positive votes for the day reading this thread. thanks guys. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dillhole Posted December 3, 2013 Share Posted December 3, 2013 Bad jokes don't translate well in plain text. entendu 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted December 3, 2013 Share Posted December 3, 2013 still.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RadDonut Posted December 3, 2013 Share Posted December 3, 2013 This thread is so great. My only contribution would be the time my wife and I (girlfriend at the time) were at a basketball game about 4 years ago with some friends and went off and had sex in a janitors closet. Come to find out the closet actually had another door that led to a room that held some computer/networking equipment or something and there was a surveillance camera watching us the whole time. We had the lights off so hopefully nothing was actually seen but whatever! YOLO (I'm using this term sarcastically by the way for all of you thinking I'm an idiot for using it) We always joke and say that the principle got the tape and hid it for himself or something stupid like that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Vool Posted December 3, 2013 Share Posted December 3, 2013 This thread is so great. My only contribution would be the time my wife and I (girlfriend at the time) were at a basketball game about 4 years ago with some friends and went off and had sex in a janitors closet. WTF is wrong with you guys? I'd never leave a basketball/soccer/football game in between to have sex! What happened to mankind and its sportsmanship? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
radiatorhums Posted December 3, 2013 Share Posted December 3, 2013 WTF is wrong with you guys? I'd never leave a basketball/soccer/football game in between to have sex! What happened to mankind and its sportsmanship? I would leave any sporting event to go have sex. But, I would probably leave a sporting event to go do anything else (I don't really care for sports or their events). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lupe Posted December 3, 2013 Share Posted December 3, 2013 Anybody know what an 'Alabama hot pocket' is? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Vool Posted December 3, 2013 Share Posted December 3, 2013 I would leave any sporting event to go have sex. But, I would probably leave a sporting event to go do anything else (I don't really care for sports or their events). Depends on the game... ...and if you have sex as often as I do... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Vool Posted December 3, 2013 Share Posted December 3, 2013 Anybody know what an 'Alabama hot pocket' is? Heard about this the first time last week...disguting! And something with "Alaska" containing the words "freezer", "poo" & "comdom"...paint your own picture! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lupe Posted December 3, 2013 Share Posted December 3, 2013 Heard about this the first time last week...disguting! And something with "Alaska" containing the words "freezer", "poo" & "comdom"...paint your own picture! Haha yeah so gross, gave me a good laugh though. Sounds chilly...haha Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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