married people questions.

[deadreckoning]

I was recently married and was curious about how other married people handled their finances and such. Do people have one joint account, kept their individual accounts or maybe just use a joint account for bills? I am wary of an uber joint account. The lady is not the best with budgeting - I am responsible for paying all the bills... We were given a bunch of checks written out to both of us some just using my last name (she kept her maiden name). Haven't gone to bank to see how we can cash them or decide what we're going to do yet.

[videogamesandvinyl]

When , my wife and I got married, we had seperate accounts for about 6 months after we said our I do's. Mainly b/c our work schedules were different and we never found time to go open a joint account. I always did the bills and still do. It was a pain in the ass paying our bills with 2 different checking accounts, imo. We opened the joint account and its been smooth sailing since then. We both have debit cards for our account and we have no issues. I know married couples that have joint and some who have seperate. My advice is to find what worls best for you guys. Marriage is great but it takes full communication and trust, especially when it comes to finances.

[seangj]

We have joint everything. Works nice. Also, we are both really good with money.

[knifeparty]

In my marriage we kept finances apart and I feel that led to too much trying to make sure bills were split and things were even. There was a joint account that like tax returns or wedding money went into but mostly things were kept separate. The marriage didn't last and that was one of the things I plan to change for next time.

So yeah, I would go with giving a joint account a try. Then everyone is kept accountable on finances and all of that.

[yocaseycasey]

My wife and I have had separate accounts ever since we got married, and it's been over a year. She doesn't work that much though, so in all actuality, it's actually like we have a joint account (my account) that we put all of the money in for bills.

[Shitty Rambo]

Joint account, it makes things easier and we both know how much the other is spending. Once you get married you should look at these things as a 'team'. I had no issues helping my wife with debts and whatnot even though all my credit debt was basically paid off. Just what you gotta do in my opinion. Make sure you partner will be responsible with impulse purchases, if you already have a home then you can loosen the belt a bit here and there, but if your trying to make a big purchase together then only purchase the bare necessities (sometimes you gotta take a break from records), skip Christmas, birthdays, any extra spending. Others will understand. My wife and I used the money from our reception on furniture and a computer, we opted out on a honeymoon.

[kriss]

We have separate accounts, but know the passwords to each other's accounts - not that any sort of deceptive spending is happening, anyway; but we're both fully aware of what the other has at all times. The bills are usually a give and take - like, all of our rent may come out of her bank one month, but then I end up covering the entire phone bill, all utilities, credit cards, all groceries, extraneous spending, etc, so it ultimately evens out (it helps that we have a monthly budget that we have drawn up and try to stick to). It's really down to how much trust you have in one another.

[stl_ben]

if you trust someone enough to marry them...one account.  Worked great so far in my marriage.

[littlebistro]

My wife's sister and her husband have seperate account and are always fighting about finances. My wife and I have a joint account and never fight about money. So there's that. Although I do miss being able to buy things without running it by her.

[blessedxcursed]

seperate right now... but we've only been married since August

[abovetheearth]

Separate seems silly

[RadDonut]

My wife and I have had joint accounts since day one. Neither of us are great with money but together we keep each other pretty accountable. We do a bi-weekly budget and that really helps with knowing what we have to spend after bills and what not. One of the worst things you can do as a couple is be unaware of where each and every penny is going to. We don't always tell each other what we are purchasing but that is also because we aren't buying crazy crap. Fast food here, some clothes there, and the occasional vinyl purchase usually doesn't add up to any more than $200. If I'm going to buy a big boxset or new video game or even a new ps4 for example, I will always discuss it with her before hand. Like it was said above, find what works for you both and if it doesn't then scratch it and try something out. Also, we have two accounts. One account for normal spending and paychecks to get put into and another strictly for paying bills and writing checks.

[smailtronic]

Joint checking and savings accounts. Income goes into checking, and bills come out of it. Money gets moved into savings here and there. Pretty simple.

[holland623]

me and my wife have a joint account that part of each paycheck gets deposited into it. we use that for monthly bills, groceries, etc... the rest goes into personal accounts. it saves from either of us feeling like the other is judging when we buy something silly or something the other isn't interested in...  

[Shitty Rambo]

Joint checking and savings accounts. Income goes into checking, and bills come out of it. Money gets moved into savings here and there. Pretty simple.

 

Oof, forgot about the savings account! Definitely get a savings account and if you can, set up auto-deposits from your checking account. Even if it's only $20-$80 a month, it adds up.

[mrewest]

My wife & I have always had separate accounts. Been married 5 great years. But we both have the same bank, & all of our accounts are visible to each other & are linked together. We each are responsible for the same various bills & she transfers me half the mortgage each time it's due. We've NEVER had financial arguments & everything works out great. If you marry the right person, then this should never be the focus of any marital strife IMO.

[sjb2k1]

my ex and i had separate accounts and we just added each other's name to them. we each paid our own share of bills and it was more like a "just in case" kind of thing for access to funds if something happened.

[¯\_(ツ)_/¯]

My wife & I have always had separate accounts. Been married 5 great years. But we both have the same bank, & all of our accounts are visible to each other & are linked together. We each are responsible for the same various bills & she transfers me half the mortgage each time it's due. We've NEVER had financial arguments & everything works out great. If you marry the right person, then this should never be the focus of any marital strife IMO.

 

ditto.  no big deal for either of us

[yocaseycasey]

Separate seems silly

Maybe to some. 

But it's all a preference things. We have separate accounts because that's just what we prefer. It's similar to the Kriss situation where we use each other's cards. But just because you have separate accounts doesn't mean your marriage is rocky or anything. 

[deadreckoning]

We have been together >10 years and I am not worried about any financial shenanigans. I am just still thinking about the best way to go. I would like to keep some of my stuff seperate just cause... hats just me. We'll probablly open a joint account and keep our old accounts for walking around money. Like someone mentioned an automatic savings account is the way to go. I have set aside a bunch without even noticing. One thing I should mention is that her school loans are more than my mortgage. I like to point out her diploma as the most expensive thing in the house.

[Derek™]

So are all of this thread's questions going to pertain to finances, or...?

[Scruffy...the janitor]

My wife and I have joint accounts, both checking and savings.  It works really well for us.  We have one savings for a house that we never touch, only add to.  The other savings account is for fun/anything.

 

My friend and his wife have separate and it works for them.  So, just like others said, whatever works for you.

[futures]

Not married, but my boyfriend & I have a joint account and we each have our separate accounts.  It works well for us.  Based on our finances and our bills per month, we've decided on an amount that we must transfer into the joint account for each paycheck that we receive.  We can't do anything else really until those funds are transferred, then we're good to go with our personal money in our accounts.  Right now we have separate savings accounts, but we plan on opening a joint savings account very soon.  After the new year we're looking into some serious saving since a lot of our debts will be paid off by January/February. (Yay!)

[BuzzersonKillwell]

We basically do the same as above plus a savings account. Direct deposit hits the joint account the pays the bills and the remainder gets dumped to savings at the end of the month. Before the direct deposit is added to the joint a pre-determined amount goes to personal fun accounts.

 

That way you each person has the opportunity to buy some dumb shit or get boozed up or whatever without having to consult or think about how it might impact the household finances.

[Shitty Rambo]

We have been together >10 years and I am not worried about any financial shenanigans. I am just still thinking about the best way to go. I would like to keep some of my stuff seperate just cause... hats just me. We'll probablly open a joint account and keep our old accounts for walking around money. Like someone mentioned an automatic savings account is the way to go. I have set aside a bunch without even noticing. One thing I should mention is that her school loans are more than my mortgage. I like to point out her diploma as the most expensive thing in the house.

In that case just get a joint account and your own credit card. Helps build you credit and gives you another source for smaller purchases, just don't miss your payments