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This is how I feel about It's Always Sunny. Everyone loves it, but it just doesn't do anything for me.

Also not a fan of Always Sunny

 

Devito is the only good part of that show imho.

 

Other shows that get the same reaction as HIMYM: Community and Parks and Recreation. Sue me.

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~* Do deee do dooo you don't have to read this but you probably will anyway dooo deeeep dooop doo *~ 

 

I don't know how to put everything I thought about tonight into words. I know To Write Love On Her Arms gets a lot of slack being "The Great American T-Shirt Racket" and all. But I truly don't believe that they deserve it. No one would get up on stage and talk to people, let alone hear their stories...if they truly weren't trying to make a difference. I stand by that. I listened to a room of college students cry and lean on strangers because they had lost their friends, their siblings, their parents to suicide. I've heard Jamie speak once before and I remember it effecting me positively, I remember thinking that he was kind and brilliant. I do not remember leaving this sad. 

 

At one point, Katie was sad too and she grabbed my hand. My body shut down for the entire time she held my hand and that was pretty awful. But I knew she was sad and she needed that, so I let her.

 

But then I remember I was so angry because they talked about how help is always available on campus and schools, how it's free. That finances should never be a reason for not getting help. I wanted to shake them and tell them the statistics. How kids are turned away from college counselors because they haven't written a plan for their suicide. How the waits to get help are 3-4 months. Some people don't have that long. A good percentage of high schools are dropping counselors because they don't have the budget for it. I've done the research because I want to help, I want to change this because it could stop kids from living the hell that I have lived. And through all of that, I've been shut down. Time and time again. But hearing them say that financial issues should never be a reason that you don't get help made me so bitter.  

 

I wanted to tell them this, just like I've wanted to tell them my story before. But this time would have been just like the last, where I just say "Hi, my name is Logan" instead of "Hi, my name is Logan and I'm going to change the world." We left because it was getting too late and Katie has school in the morning. So I didn't even get the chance to see if courage would strike. 

 

The worst of it all is that I want to write out my story, I want to tell people that it's important to keep living. But I won't because I'm too afraid to face my past and the worst part is that part of me doesn't want to do it because I don't want to cry. 

You can ignore this, I just needed to put my feelings somewhere because I'm feeling too many and I'm overwhelmed.

 

You know what the worst part of this is? That I came home after listening to 6 kids talk about their parents committing suicide. I walked in the door and wanted to tell my mom how much she meant to me but instead she just said "oh." and went back to watching TV. 

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Logan if you ever need to talk about that stuff I'm here. I'm studying to be a counselor because of the stuff I experienced as a teenager. Depression runs in my family but we never talk about it and I only recently found out how extensive it is, so I know where you're coming from. I know a lot of people say it but I really do mean that if you ever need to talk I'm here

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You wrote a lot Logan. Im 18 months out of the Aunt i tried to save dying by suicide and I've still only really been able to tell a good bit of it once. I still have night terrors. I still feel like a failure.

Know whats really fucked? When my phone was stolen on Saturday i thought of the last three voicemails i still had on there from her that I wouldn't delete. They were nasty and mean messages but it's the last of her voice i had.

Those left behind and all we have to process is pretty messed up. Stay strong kid. Knowing you're not alone in these feelings helps me at least feel safe and sane.

I hope your night looks up.

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Sadness ahead

When I was in 7th grade, I woke up one morning (February 7th) and my mom was sobbing at the kitchen table. I asked her what was going on and she said 'billy shot himself'. my 7th grade brain didn't understand what was going on. I though he had an accident with a gun but was going to be okay. He was one of my best friends and we were 'dating', whatever what means when you're that young. He had shot himself in the head and left a note behind. We heard a lot of rumors, school was too hard, family problems. I didn't understand it. The showing and funeral, to this day, were some of the hardest days of my life. His dad just grabbed me and screamed, it still makes me cry thinking about it. They brought in counselors at school for us, but I didn't see one and I've always wished I had. I seriously don't know if I processed it until years later. I ended up going to college with his older sister and we became best friends. Sometimes she would cry when we got drunk together because I reminded her so much of him. I've seen how much her life has been effected by the loss, and it breaks my heart. My other friend went into a dark, dark place after he came out to his family, only to watch his entire family crumble weeks later when he found out his mom had been cheating on his dad for 6 years. I remember sitting in his basement with him, knowing he hadnt gotten out of bed for 3 days, hoping he'd be okay and not wanting to leave Incase he did something.

My point is, I agree with you Logan. No one wants to care about things like this until it happens directly to them or someone they love, and that is sad, there needs to be more support for people who can't afford it.

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My brother will be driving to the south side of town tomorrow. I have procured a few harmonicas and I am going outside to attach them behind the grille of his car right now. 

 

Happy April Fools Day.

 

 

pictures or video.  i love me a good prank.

 

 

also, logan love, I'm PMing you.

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  • Shitty Rambo changed the title to Small Talk Revival Thread
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