Satan Posted December 7, 2013 Share Posted December 7, 2013 I need to get a girl to sign up with me for a workshop here: http://www.armorystudios.com/workshops/ oh holy shit, this sounds fun. really. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thedillon Posted December 9, 2013 Share Posted December 9, 2013 Due to lack of stories I guess I'll bring this oldie but goodie out. It was my sophomore year in college, I was in a fraternity, and I took this girl to a date party. For those of you who don't know what a "date party" is... it's basically an unsupervised high school dance where everyone is really drunk and makes bad decisions. Anyway, I had been talking to this girl on and off for about a month. I wasn't really that into her. I was more into her best friend but her best friend was dating a fraternity brother of mine so I decided to go for her friend instead. She was odd and quirky and a little out there for me. We went to the date party and of course got really drunk blah blah blah ended back up in my room. This was our first time to fool around so I was excited but nervous (was on a bit of a drought). She starts with a little foreplay jerking me off while we're making out. I take her shirt off and start playing around there and then she says "Do you want me to give you a blow job?". Of course I oblige and 2 second after she starts she then stops and asks me "Are you close yet?". Seriously? You just started. No, I'm not close. So I politely say "No, not really." and she goes back to the HJ. After awhile she finally gets me off and well it had been awhile so there was a bit of a mess. She starts rubbing the mess all over my chest and stomach making an even bigger mess so I say "What are you doing?". She goes "What? You don't like it?" and then proceeds to smack me on my face with my own jizz. Yes. I got slapped in the face with my own jizz. I jumped off the bed, grabbed a towel, cleaned myself up and told her it was time to go. The End. hobohunter48, turbobrando, GradedOnACurve and 7 others 10 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
konk Posted December 9, 2013 Share Posted December 9, 2013 Wow! I feel like she was getting back at someone for doing those things to her. Or maybe they did that to her so she thought that was how it went. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thedillon Posted December 9, 2013 Share Posted December 9, 2013 Wow! I feel like she was getting back at someone for doing those things to her. Or maybe they did that to her so she thought that was how it went. meh, it was a pretty normal evening and I was very respectful! hadn't done anything at any point to warrant that except for the fact that I was settling for her over her friend (which she had no idea about) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Satan Posted December 9, 2013 Share Posted December 9, 2013 Due to lack of stories I guess I'll bring this oldie but goodie out. It was my sophomore year in college, I was in a fraternity, and I took this girl to a date party. For those of you who don't know what a "date party" is... it's basically an unsupervised high school dance where everyone is really drunk and makes bad decisions. Anyway, I had been talking to this girl on and off for about a month. I wasn't really that into her. I was more into her best friend but her best friend was dating a fraternity brother of mine so I decided to go for her friend instead. She was odd and quirky and a little out there for me. We went to the date party and of course got really drunk blah blah blah ended back up in my room. This was our first time to fool around so I was excited but nervous (was on a bit of a drought). She starts with a little foreplay jerking me off while we're making out. I take her shirt off and start playing around there and then she says "Do you want me to give you a blow job?". Of course I oblige and 2 second after she starts she then stops and asks me "Are you close yet?". Seriously? You just started. No, I'm not close. So I politely say "No, not really." and she goes back to the HJ. After awhile she finally gets me off and well it had been awhile so there was a bit of a mess. She starts rubbing the mess all over my chest and stomach making an even bigger mess so I say "What are you doing?". She goes "What? You don't like it?" and then proceeds to smack me on my face with my own jizz. Yes. I got slapped in the face with my own jizz. I jumped off the bed, grabbed a towel, cleaned myself up and told her it was time to go. The End. while she was rubbing it on your chest, i hope she was singing soft kitty to you. if not... "soft kitty, warm kitty little ball of fur. happy kitty, sleepy kitty. purr. purr. purr." TheMoosen, thedillon and sinisterkidd 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
radiatorhums Posted December 9, 2013 Share Posted December 9, 2013 That might be my favorite story in a while, I've never really heard of a girl rubbing cum on the guy. I would be very confused if that happened to me, although I don't think I'd be mad at all. Was it a playful jizz slap or was it a malicious one? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thedillon Posted December 9, 2013 Share Posted December 9, 2013 That might be my favorite story in a while, I've never really heard of a girl rubbing cum on the guy. I would be very confused if that happened to me, although I don't think I'd be mad at all. Was it a playful jizz slap or was it a malicious one? it was a playful slap but I was so confused and taken back hahah Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jtcohenour Posted December 9, 2013 Share Posted December 9, 2013 it was a playful slap but I was so confused and taken back hahah I bet Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted December 9, 2013 Share Posted December 9, 2013 Not one of my stories, but a close friend. Mt Holyoke college features this campus-wide party every year called Vegas Night. Tickets sell out almost instantly, and it's a bunch of fun- and mostly just a giant excuse for all these uptight girls to go nuts for one night. Shit, they keep a couple ambulances on hand because of how sick these girls get. And they don't just get drunk- this is the first time in the semester that any guys show up on campus, knowing that they're pretty much a lock to get it in. Well several years ago, a few friends got their hands on some last second tickets. One of them began the night a virgin. The details in the middle are light but probably unnecessary. All I know is that both of my friends ended up in a room with two girls, one of them a lesbian. It wasn't long before all the clothes were off, and the 4 of them were just kind of going at it- the way that you'd expect a guy a girl a virgin and a lesbian would. At one point, my experienced friend actually Pushed the other aside and said "let me show you how it's done". That would have been my cue to leave also, and he tagged out shortly after. Great move, because he ended up coming across another drunken bitty lookin for some action. Again, began the night a virgin, and penetrated 2-3 vaginas by the end. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
serum7 Posted December 9, 2013 Share Posted December 9, 2013 This guy at work just broke up with his fiancee. During their fight she stuck her hand down her pants, covered it in period blood, and slapped/smeared it on his face. She was a little unstable. jase 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted December 9, 2013 Share Posted December 9, 2013 Omg your avatar.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
laralaurent Posted December 9, 2013 Share Posted December 9, 2013 She was a little unstable. omg vom. that story needs a warning haha. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sinisterkidd Posted December 9, 2013 Share Posted December 9, 2013 This guy at work just broke up with his fiancee. During their fight she stuck her hand down her pants, covered it in period blood, and slapped/smeared it on his face. She was a little unstable. Oh my god! I was watching this shitty movie on netflix the other night and this cick did that to some bitch. I was like who comes up with this shit? but yeeeea, thats pretty disgusting Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted December 9, 2013 Share Posted December 9, 2013 I've always wanted to slap someone across the face with a handful of glitter. Especially if that person is bearded. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
deafening Posted December 9, 2013 Share Posted December 9, 2013 I've always wanted to slap someone across the face with a handful of glitter. Especially if that person is bearded. This guy at work just broke up with his fiancee. During their fight she stuck her hand down her pants, covered it in period blood, and slapped/smeared it on his face. She was a little unstable. I might almost maybe argue that glitter would be worse. Almost. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
roadmonkey Posted December 9, 2013 Share Posted December 9, 2013 mental note.. get one of those poofy talc powder applicators and make a mixture of talc and glitter. Repeat whipped cream story from other day except smacker her in the face with poof Oor run around SF and smack bearded hipsters with the poof. Make youtube video make money bang women. Smack them with the poof Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jtcohenour Posted December 10, 2013 Share Posted December 10, 2013 Not one of my stories, but a close friend. Mt Holyoke college features this campus-wide party every year called Vegas Night. Tickets sell out almost instantly, and it's a bunch of fun- and mostly just a giant excuse for all these uptight girls to go nuts for one night. Shit, they keep a couple ambulances on hand because of how sick these girls get. And they don't just get drunk- this is the first time in the semester that any guys show up on campus, knowing that they're pretty much a lock to get it in. Well several years ago, a few friends got their hands on some last second tickets. One of them began the night a virgin. The details in the middle are light but probably unnecessary. All I know is that both of my friends ended up in a room with two girls, one of them a lesbian. It wasn't long before all the clothes were off, and the 4 of them were just kind of going at it- the way that you'd expect a guy a girl a virgin and a lesbian would. At one point, my experienced friend actually Pushed the other aside and said "let me show you how it's done". That would have been my cue to leave also, and he tagged out shortly after. Great move, because he ended up coming across another drunken bitty lookin for some action. Again, began the night a virgin, and penetrated 2-3 vaginas by the end. Sounds like a better story about losing ones virginity than most have Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dillhole Posted December 10, 2013 Share Posted December 10, 2013 Sounds about the best way to lose it. At least a more real world way vs. banging 2-3 broads at the same time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Vool Posted December 10, 2013 Share Posted December 10, 2013 I wake up my girlfriend by slapping my cock on her forehead...it's fun, try it! Forgot to mention my favorite part: it sounds as if two octopuses are fighting and slapping each other with their tentacles parkinglot 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dillhole Posted December 10, 2013 Share Posted December 10, 2013 Gave her the old mushroom stamp. Good man!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
radiatorhums Posted December 10, 2013 Share Posted December 10, 2013 Gave her the old mushroom stamp. Good man!! I haven't heard that term in years, I just got a good laugh from it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
roadmonkey Posted December 10, 2013 Share Posted December 10, 2013 this belongs here: cbbrew22 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted December 10, 2013 Share Posted December 10, 2013 Ahhh, the old portobello bruise! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abovetheearth Posted December 10, 2013 Share Posted December 10, 2013 This guy at work just broke up with his fiancee. During their fight she stuck her hand down her pants, covered it in period blood, and slapped/smeared it on his face. She was a little unstable. was his name...Wilson? Tommy, deafening, Satan and 1 other 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
edgedestroys Posted December 11, 2013 Share Posted December 11, 2013 "Might husband the next guy that nails me if he says "let's open this pit up" when he puts it in" An actual thing I said today. I'm literally too gay to exist. sinisterkidd and Satan 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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