Jump to content

Disensitizer and Condom


Recommended Posts

While it should be reserved for college kids or super rich snobby parties, lines of blow certainly do the trick.  Plus most chics love blow so there's nothing better than 2 people geeked out on lines fuckin' till the sun comes up.

 

Man....college was fun and then adulthood set in hard.  Can't say I miss those days, but sometimes, I miss those days.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Why did I not venture into this thread sooner. LULZ abound.

 

Also anyone ever have sex at work?

 

Guilty.

 

I worked at a movie theater for 6 years. With a staff of about 50-60 people and constant turnover there were always a few attractive girls that were working there at any given point. 4 of the 16 theaters had a second level "mezzanine" that no one really ever used. Needless to say there was more than one occasion in which I got paid to "supervise" the closing of the building while I was supervising some titties. It was never really that good, as you would probably expect for it being sex when you've been sweating all day and you wreak of popcorn.. but it was a hell of a lot of fun. I've also had a girl go down on me when we were cleaning up between shows. I made the best of my perks for that shitty minimum wage job.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Also can we stop and talk about the joys of getting it on multiple times in one night. The best is doing it once, 10 minute power nap, waking up and doing it again and lasting like 3 times as long as the first time.

 

Rinse and repeat.

 

yes this.

i use trojan, because i never see any other brands with a large size.  B)

 

 

i also enjoy those nights where it goes 10 rounds. partially because i sometimes have the inability to finish, and i appreciate when a woman is as invested as getting me off as i am her.

that and i just like chowin' down.

WHOOPS i dropped my magnum condom that i use for my monster dong

 

Why did I not venture into this thread sooner. LULZ abound.

 

Also anyone ever have sex at work?

once i masturbated at work does that count?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

One time I went to CVS Pharmacy with my girlfriend to get condoms. I live in Cincinnati so everything is locked down in stores like that. The condoms were all in a case that had to be unlocked by someone, and a big red button at the top to "push for assistance".

 

So I pushed it, and over the intercom someone says "ASSISTANCE IN FAMILY PLANNING. ASSISTANCE IN FAMILY PLANNING."

 

Then a security guard pops his head around the corner of the aisle with the biggest grin on his face. Walks toward us all smiley and goes "Need help?"

 

And I was like "YEAH. I NEED SOME CONDOMS."

 

And then he goes "What size?"

 

That was the point I realized he was going to try to make this situation as awkward as possible. And I know how to play that game. So I said with a 100% serious face "The smallest ones you have"

 

He didn't really know what to say so he just laughed and stood there and I took some Trojan ecstasy and went on my way.

 

It was great.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I've seen an absurd amount of titties while working at a Borders for 4 years. Book nerd chicks are frisky.

One of my coworkers pushed me against the ice machine in the cafe and started kissing me. I was a supervisor and she was kind of manipulative and crazy so I suspected she wanted to get me fired or some shit. She sent me tit pix when she got home.

Me and my gf at the time started doing things in the stockroom one day... Like both our tits were out. But then people started asking for backup on our links so we got freaked out. Banged in parking lot after close.

I kept making jokes to my male manager about me and him going to a hotel room or me fucking his wife. Eventually he got a boner. And I was all "lol well show me" he actually whipped it out. Shrug. I was all "oh wow. Good for you"

Started texting his wife to follow up on max lolz. Flirty/inappropriate messages for a few weeks. he hated it. But then shit got real when she invited me to go to New York with her for a weekend without her husband. I couldn't go through with it.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Admittedly aforementioned girlfriend and aforementioned manager made out a few times after me and her broke up. He was telling her he'd leave his wife for her and blah blah. Soooo fucking around with his wife was my revenge.

ps the invite to New York was to go to A Molly ringwald book signing, lol.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

i was in a dorm room with the bros in 98. some rando chick asks if anyone wants to go to a football championship game.

 

i grab her hand. complete stranger. off we go. it was in st louis. pretty far away.

 

2 hours later i stick it in her pooper. she LOVED it. was a total screamer..liked to be smacked around too.

 

i tore that thing up. she limped to class for a week.

 

oh, we lost the game in OT.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

i was in a dorm room with the bros in 98. some rando chick asks if anyone wants to go to a football championship game.

 

i grab her hand. complete stranger. off we go. it was in st louis. pretty far away.

 

2 hours later i stick it in her pooper. she LOVED it. was a total screamer..liked to be smacked around too.

 

i tore that thing up. she limped to class for a week.

 

oh, we lost the game in OT.

 

this thread will never die.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

avoided this thread cause i thought it was going to be about some shitty VC band.

 

my thoughts: i'm pretty sure i can tell who was full of shit at the beginning and who it got to share some pretty dark, fantastic shit. very amused.

 

30% of this thread is just derrick cook exclaiming how great this thread is. because he's a child.

 

you guys know children are reading this, right?

 

hump.gif

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

 Share

×

AdBlock Detected

spacer.png

We noticed that you're using an adBlocker

Yes, I'll whitelist